Practice Social Quiet: It Keeps Your Relationship Healthy

Source: graphicriver

If you are like most people quarantined with their partner, chances are that you have had a tiff or two, and being a keen observer of the human rage, I’d wager the tiffs have not yet hit their apex. Here’s where I recommend a quarantine tactic that can help you flatten the argumentative curve so you can stay physically and emotionally healthy: Social quiet.

Scientists have determined that the act of speaking can discharge droplets that spread a virus so we have to assume that is true for the Covid-19 too. Using the same ground rules for physical distancing, social quiet means if you are within six feet of your partner, you keep your thoughts to yourself.

Makes sense, doesn’t it? Do you really need your partner sitting next to you whining that they are going nuts or that it's your turn to play with the kids? And for sure, hearing your partner lament his or her anxieties about the economy is sure to rub off on you.

Psychologists have long known about emotional contagion—that emotions are akin to a social virus, spreading from one individual to another. Whereas coronavirus is spread via coughing, sneezing, touching, and talking, emotions spread via emotional transmitters—facial expressions, sound, and behavioral gestures.

Someone smiles at you and you instinctively smile back—a common example of “catching” the emotions of others. It's like the laugh track on a TV sitcom: It’s played to make you laugh, too, or more accurately, to “infect” you with laughter. Dozens of studies show that living with depressed, anxious individuals can make their partners more likely to feel the same.

Yes, a voice that sounds anxious, angry, dejected, or depressed can infect you. Social quiet allows you to ward off that infection for the sake of your health and emotional well-being by giving you permission to tell your partner, "Shut your mouth." If your partner fails to adhere to the guideline, there is a good chance you will find your heartbeat increasing, feel as though you are boiling, and just want to nod out.

Dr. Anthony Fauci has repeatedly pointed out that we need to be mindful of the fact our behavior impacts the health of others. That means that, for the sake of your partner, you practice social quiet too. You’re already mindful of not touching your mouth. Now be mindful of not opening your mouth. Your partner will appreciate it.

Washing your hands vigorously, physical distancing, wearing a mask, and sanitizing your environment will all minimize your chances of getting the virus, but practicing social quiet can prevent you from getting a divorce and maybe even make you and your partner wish the quarantine was longer.