Finding Meaning in the Natural Process of Aging

Source: Gerd Altmann/Pixabay

The aging population across the globe is giving rise to many psychological, social, medical, and economic challenges. All of us can benefit from gaining a greater awareness of these challenges, including our own attitudes toward aging, how we can find deeper meaning in our aging journey, and importantly, how we can treat others in their senior years.

According to World Bank data, the 65-plus age group represents on average approximately 10% of the world population but is higher in Japan (30%), the EU (22%), Canada (19%), and the U.S. (17%). Korea, Greece, Poland, Brazil, and China represent some of the countries with the fastest-aging populations. According to the World Population Aging report by the United Nations Population Division, the percentage of populations over the age of 65 is forecast to reach 16% overall, and up to 38% in some countries, by 2050.

To gauge your perspective toward aging, ask yourself a few simple questions:

• Do you criticize or make fun of others because of their age?
• Do you believe most people should retire by age 65?
• Do you think all seniors are poor drivers?
• Do you believe medical procedures should be limited for people over 65?
• Do you believe that older workers are more difficult to train, are slow with technology, and are resistant to change?
• Do you tend to dismiss ideas presented by older people as being outdated or no longer relevant for today’s world?
• Do you think only old people have “moments” when they forget something (often referred to as “senior moments”)?
• Name a movie that starred a 65+ person who was not cast as the typical/stereotyped person in their “golden years”?

Ageism

Ageism is defined as discrimination, prejudice, or criticism based on a person’s chronological age or based on the perception of a person being old or “elderly.” Discrimination can take many forms, including those based on negative stereotypes such as being forgetful, helpless, slow to learn, and unable to contribute fully to work or society. These stereotypes are often reinforced by government and business leaders, the media, younger people, and even ourselves.

Some of this ageism is due to our youth-obsessed society where we feel the need to look young and attractive to be noticed, maintain credibility, and succeed. This has led to a booming market in hair color products and plastic surgery to remove wrinkles or cellulite and other signs of aging. Women, especially, are afraid to wear their natural white or gray hair color because of the fear they might be perceived as giving up!

There is even a word for the fear of elderly people—gerontophobia—which is defined as an irrational or disproportionate fear of old age, especially of growing old, as well as the fear of or aversion to old people. We can suffer from gerontophobia against ourselves or we can hold others prisoners of our thoughts by discriminating against them because they are “old.”

We may have internalized negative stereotypes about aging that we have heard over many years. This may have led to a fear of the aging process, a fear that we will become disabled (physically or mentally), or a fear that we will become invisible, rejected, or discounted due to our age.

While much attention has been placed on diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) initiatives to address racism and sexism, very little has been directed toward raising awareness of and taking corrective action against ageism. Does DEI include 65+? Is ageism a human rights issue?

While some organizations and businesses have started to shift the conversation to address ageism (including AARP, the United Nations, and the World Health Organization), progress has been slow. It is up to us to change our own attitudes and behaviors toward aging, including being kinder to older people and recognizing their inherent value.

Combatting Our Own Fears of Aging

The simple fact of life is that all of us will age. We all grow older each day, so it is best to prepare ourselves to combat our own fears of aging and, instead, boost our vitality in as many ways as we can. Here are three coping mechanisms:

1. Older people need to have the self-confidence to defy social pressure to appear youthful and opt instead to look the best they can, whatever their personal circumstances. Live your own life not one dictated by others.
2. Raise your vitality and energy levels by eating healthy food, exercising, and having positive thoughts about the present and the future. (If you are suffering from depression or anxiety, or if you consistently feel invisible, isolated, or irrelevant, seek advice from others, including professional therapists who specialize in aging.)
3. Implement the OPA Formula¹ which highlights three keys to living with joy and meaning at all ages: Connect Meaningfully with Others (O), Engage with Deeper Purpose (P), and Embrace Life With Attitude (A). For example, contributing to others; interacting socially with others every day; living each day with a larger purpose or goals in your life; and embracing an open mind, curiosity, and optimism, can all contribute to shifting the focus from the negative stereotypes of aging to more positive ones.

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Aging, in many respects, is a self-fulfilling prophecy. The more we are told we are old, the more we believe we are. The older we feel we are, the older we act. The more we discriminate against older people, the more we reinforce the negative stereotypes and ageism. It is our choice to believe that we are feeble and dependent or strong and independent. Now is the time to take active steps to address the ageism in our lives and prepare to live joyful, vibrant, optimistic, and meaningful lives, regardless of age.