Ferreting Out a Female Co-Worker Psychopath

What does it feel like to have a psychopath work alongside you? Are there any tell-tale signs? Much has been written about the psychopathic boss, but what about your co-worker—the person at the next desk, not the one in the corner office?

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The psychopath often seems the perfect candidate.

Your co-worker probably made herself look like the perfect candidate for the position when she was hired. She most likely came equipped with an overblown resume that was tailor-made for the position. Since a psychopath has no shame, guilt, or remorse, embellishing her resume elicited no qualms. Her interview may have been sparkling, creating the impression that she was destined for this job. The HR specialist would be remiss not to hire her. According to psychopathy researchers Paul Babiak and Robert D. Hare, “To find someone who seems to have a natural talent for influence and persuasion is rare. When found, it is hard for decision makers to look past it.”¹

The psychopath selects targets and enablers.

Once on the job, the psychopath has an uncanny ability to interact with and quickly size up fellow employees. She discerns who to befriend. She may be effusive, gregarious, and perhaps even larger than life. Depending on her strategy of attack, she may seek out attention or, conversely, be calculatedly unassuming. In either case, she is often able to make a great first impression. However, as pioneering psychopathy expert Dr. Hervey Cleckley noted in the mid-1900s, “Though (s)he may give an early impression of being a most reliable person, it will soon be found that she has no sense of responsibility whatsoever to others.”²

If the psychopathic co-worker determines she can either exploit you or use you in her exploitation schemes, she may whisper salacious “secrets” and playfully use “girl talk” to lure you closer. But, of course, you must not divulge her secrets since you have been specially chosen as her “friend.” The more the psychopath shares allegedly personal information with you, the greater chance you are being set up. According to Babiak and Hare, “They are known for their ability ‘to don many masks,' change ‘who they are’ depending upon the person with whom they are interacting, and make themselves appear likable to their intended victim.”³

She uses a divide-and-conquer strategy.

The psychopath often uses a divide-and-conquer strategy, planting misinformation or disinformation and pitting select co-workers against each other to advance her own position. This can bring divisions in the company or department, affecting morale and productivity. The psychopath uses charm to establish herself as someone who can be trusted. She sets her stage by dropping names of influential people whom she claims to know. She safeguards her position by building connections with higher-ups. When things go wrong, she has already fingered who should get the blame. As she moves onward, someone who has no idea of what has happened is transferred out of the department, or worse, fired.

She believes she has entitlement, and she wants power and control.

The psychopath has feelings for no one. As psychopathy expert J. Reid Meloy notes, all she wants is “power and control.”⁴ Believing she is entitled, she does not adhere to company policies and rules. Going to meetings and coming in on time is of little importance to her. The grind of work is boring, and she will always seek someone to perform the tasks she feels are beneath her. Since the psychopath believes and often projects to others that she is so big and so important, she often gets away with pushing her work onto others. Hare indicates, if one gets anything at all from the psychopath, it is because the psychopath always “takes more than they give.”⁵

What can you do?

Beware of confrontations. The psychopath will take the credit for your work, and, if you stand up to her, Dr. Hare states that you will find yourself embroiled in a battle that may need “good professional advice.”⁶

The truth is you may not win, and, worse, you may find yourself fired because of distorted information spread by the psychopath. The psychopath delights in making others miserable. This is humorous to her. According to psychoanalyst Ben Karpman, “…the psychopath sees humor as cruelty and [her] humor is sharply charged with sadistic elements….⁷ If you penetrate her charm and her tricks, what you have underneath is a cruel individual who will use you until she no longer needs you. According to psychopathy expert Dr. J. Reid Meloy, “Sadistic control is also an element of perversion and is [indicative] of psychopathic disturbance that is usually untreatable by psychotherapy….”⁸

Be on guard for little clues from your all-too-charming co-worker who wants to share her secrets and then uses you to boost herself. It may be best to seek a reassignment or even to move on to another employer. Peace of mind may require it!