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Love's Evolver

All things related to love, evolution, and psychology

Relationships
The Science Behind Falling in Love

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on February 12, 2013

Although you might feel that your experience of falling in love is unique, science can explain why you have lost your appetite or why you think the sky is bluer than normal.

Although you might feel that your experience of falling in love is unique, science can explain why you have lost your appetite or why you think the sky is bluer than normal.

Friends
Turning Friends into Porn Stars

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on March 28, 2011

People have been looking at their ‘friends' on Facebook for years now, and men especially have been fantasizing about the people they know using this site. New software now explicitly helps us take those unsuspecting friends into pornographic directions.

People have been looking at their ‘friends' on Facebook for years now, and men especially have been fantasizing about the people they know using this site. New software now explicitly helps us take those unsuspecting friends into pornographic directions.

Sex
New Findings about Americans' Sexual Experiences

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on March 17, 2011

What percentage of Americans aged 15-44 have had oral sex? Sexual intercourse? Experience with same-sex partners? Does education affect sexual activity? Sure does - those with higher education are more likely to have experience with oral sex.

What percentage of Americans aged 15-44 have had oral sex? Sexual intercourse? Experience with same-sex partners? Does education affect sexual activity? Sure does - those with higher education are more likely to have experience with oral sex.

Happiness
Sexual Monogamy Does Not "Lead" to Happiness

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on March 12, 2011

It’s simply wrong to assume that sexual promiscuity causes unhappiness. This is certainly an interesting issue, but we must also remember that it’s a complex one.

It’s simply wrong to assume that sexual promiscuity causes unhappiness. This is certainly an interesting issue, but we must also remember that it’s a complex one.

Jealousy
The dark side of friendship

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on March 5, 2011

For some unknown reason in our evolved psychology, we often like to watch ‘tall poppies' do poorly, even if that person is a "friend." If we feel someone doesn't deserve something, we might be very happy to see them fail.

For some unknown reason in our evolved psychology, we often like to watch ‘tall poppies' do poorly, even if that person is a "friend." If we feel someone doesn't deserve something, we might be very happy to see them fail.

Sport and Competition
Yes, Women Do Compete for Men

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on February 21, 2011

Women — and to a lesser extent, men — compete against same-sex rivals for mates. Much of this competition is unconscious, and some of it can be disguised.

Women — and to a lesser extent, men — compete against same-sex rivals for mates. Much of this competition is unconscious, and some of it can be disguised.

Sex
Exercise for Better Sex

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on February 17, 2011

Sex can be physically tiring, just like any other physical activity, particularly if it's sustained for a long duration. With the spring around the corner, and people's thoughts turn to love (and lust), now is a good time to think about exercise.

Sex can be physically tiring, just like any other physical activity, particularly if it's sustained for a long duration. With the spring around the corner, and people's thoughts turn to love (and lust), now is a good time to think about exercise.

Sex
The Relationship Between Sex and Food

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on February 9, 2011

If you're thinking of a romantic gift for a lover, why buy just the usual box of chocolates? Instead you could make an "aphrodisiac basket."

If you're thinking of a romantic gift for a lover, why buy just the usual box of chocolates? Instead you could make an "aphrodisiac basket."

Relationships
Breakup Etiquette: What Not To Do

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on December 14, 2010

Most of us have been there: the end of the romantic relationship.  There might have been a full disclosure about why the person was dumping you, or maybe they just drifted away without a word. Hopefully, though, no matter how the breakup went, the person didn't hire someone to dump you.

Most of us have been there: the end of the romantic relationship.  There might have been a full disclosure about why the person was dumping you, or maybe they just drifted away without a word. Hopefully, though, no matter how the breakup went, the person didn't hire someone to dump you.

Relationships
How Much Do Romance Novels Reflect Women's Desires?

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on July 16, 2010

Awhile ago, I started studying Harlequin romance novels. Yes, those ones you see at the grocery store. Don't dismiss them so fast - just so you know, romance novels are extremely popular. Romance is the most sold fiction genre in the USA. I thought it would be interesting to explore them in an effort to understand women better.

Awhile ago, I started studying Harlequin romance novels. Yes, those ones you see at the grocery store. Don't dismiss them so fast - just so you know, romance novels are extremely popular. Romance is the most sold fiction genre in the USA. I thought it would be interesting to explore them in an effort to understand women better.

Mating
Romance is Dead: Reflections on Today's Dating Scene

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on June 2, 2010

I have asked women about their perceptions of the dating market. A comment I heard is that they greatly dislike the dating scene today. There are three main sources of concern - the quality of the mate, the energies they have to undertake to self promote, and the competition they face. What does this all mean? In today's dating scene, romance has been pushed to the side.

I have asked women about their perceptions of the dating market. A comment I heard is that they greatly dislike the dating scene today. There are three main sources of concern - the quality of the mate, the energies they have to undertake to self promote, and the competition they face. What does this all mean? In today's dating scene, romance has been pushed to the side.

Guilt
Why It's Good to Feel Guilty

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on May 14, 2010

Why do we engage in guilty pleasures, then, since we know that guilt is a demon? It is an awful, horrible sensation that eats away at your mind, consuming you if you let it, and eventually leaves you emotionally drained. It must be because the pleasure part outweighs the guilt part.

Why do we engage in guilty pleasures, then, since we know that guilt is a demon? It is an awful, horrible sensation that eats away at your mind, consuming you if you let it, and eventually leaves you emotionally drained. It must be because the pleasure part outweighs the guilt part.

Relationships
What Do You Want From Me?

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on May 11, 2010

"What do you want from me?" seems to be one of the first questions that pops into our minds when a relationship begins to go sour. Why is that?

"What do you want from me?" seems to be one of the first questions that pops into our minds when a relationship begins to go sour. Why is that?

Relationships
Why Love is Romantic

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on May 7, 2010

Finally, some true romance! Here was this person, a man I presume, who I came to think of as a modern-day Romeo, pining away for the woman he truly loved.

Finally, some true romance! Here was this person, a man I presume, who I came to think of as a modern-day Romeo, pining away for the woman he truly loved.

Sex
You Must Kiss More Than The Lips

Maryanne L. Fisher Ph.D. on April 30, 2010

Think of Casablanca, where we see the romance, not the sex, between Ilsa and Rick (aka Ingrid Bergman and Humphrey Bogart). Their final kiss is pure romance, the kind that grabs you in your gut and squeezes. It isn’t a kiss that is meeting some sexual need – it’s so very much deeper, and I think you all know the kind of kiss I’m talking about.

Think of Casablanca, where we see the romance, not the sex, between Ilsa and Rick (aka Ingrid Bergman and Humphrey Bogart). Their final kiss is pure romance, the kind that grabs you in your gut and squeezes. It isn’t a kiss that is meeting some sexual need – it’s so very much deeper, and I think you all know the kind of kiss I’m talking about.

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The Perfectionism Trap

When we fall prey to perfectionism, we think we’re honorably aspiring to be our very best, but often we’re really just setting ourselves up for failure, as perfection is impossible and its pursuit inevitably backfires.

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