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UC Berkeley is among the growing number of colleges offering a student-run course in adulting, life's practicalities.
If I were teaching a course on adulting, here’s what I’d hope would be the main takeaways.
Time
When young, it’s easy to think time is unlimited. It’s not and it is your most precious and vanishing resource. Ongoing, ask yourself, “Is this a wise use of my time?” Do that not just in choosing tasks but in how you’re doing them. Sometimes, it’s wise to take extra time in the service of perfection but other times, that time is better spent elsewhere. For example, does your room really need to stay immaculate? Of course, we’re human, so sometimes, we’ll fritter time, but the goal is to stay conscious of your decision: work or play, efficient or perfectionistic.
For some people, that mindset is all that’s needed. But if you need tactics to help you implement that mindset, consider these:
A routine: A regular routine can help you can get done what you want. The night before or that morning, list your tentative plan for the day. For example, if you’re a morning person, schedule hard or odious tasks for the morning. Or link an unpleasant task to a meal: For example, you’ll have dinner only after you’ve exercised.
Chunking. Especially for a big, ugly task, try breaking it into baby steps and check each off as it’s done. Or use the Pomodoro technique, named after those tomato-shaped kitchen timers but any timer will do, including the one in your phone. Set it for 25 minutes. Work the 25 then take 5 to do whatever you like. Repeat.
Social influence. Some people are motivated by peers. So if you have a big project—whether it’s a paper to write or to lose 10 pounds — you might let your social-media friends know your goal and deadline. You’d be embarrassed to tell them you didn’t meet your goal. Or join or start a support group that meets weekly or monthly, in-person, on a teleconference such as Freeteleconference.com or videoconference: Skype, Zoom, Facetime, or Hangout.
If you’re still in school and want a part-time job, try to find one that’s a career launchpad. For example, if you’re thinking about a career as a counselor, get a job, even as a receptionist, at a counseling clinic.
The most likely route to a good launchpad job is connections: family, friends, family of friends. There's no shame in telling everyone the sort of work you’re looking for and what you bring to the table. For example, “I’m graduating soon with a degree in psychology and would enjoy working for a non-profit or government agency that helps struggling kids or even adults. Know anyone I should talk with?”
In choosing a career, focus less on money and more on whether it uses your natural skills and interests. That’s because:
- While average pay in high-pay professions is high, half of people earn less, often much less because, unless your relevant abilities are excellent and you’re driven, it’s hard to succeed in such professions. And many people don't even get past the arduous training: for example, law school, med school, or CPA program.
- Even if you succeed, you’ll lose much of the higher income in taxes that the salary bump won't improve your lifestyle much.
- Many jobs pay well because most people don't find them intrinsically rewarding, for example, bond traders, commercial insurance salespeople, and corporate lawyers who spend their life fighting to wrest money for their corporate client from their tough opponent’s corporate client.
Spending
True, America runs on credit but you get no pleasure from paying interest. And indeed the long-term pleasure of “stuff,” the materialistic lifestyle, can get dwarfed by feeling overwhelmed by payments. It’s ultimately wiser, for example, to buy a $2,000 old Toyota that you can afford to buy for cash (Do get it checked out by a mechanic) than buying a $30,000 new coolmobile on credit. Going out with your friends for a hike and Boba tea can be as enjoyable as expensive clubbing and concerts where you can’t hear what anyone is saying.
Regarding saving, it's generally wise to invest every time you have a few hundred dollars that you think you won’t need for at least a few months. If you’re very risk-averse, put the money in a top-yielding bank CD. Bankrate.com lists the highest rates, currently 3%, twice the inflation rate. If you’re willing to accept some risk for likely greater returns, try a low-cost mutual fund such as Vanguard Life Strategy Growth Fund. Or for potentially greater returns but with more risk, you might do as I have: Put money in Vanguard Growth Index Fund. (Disclosure: I am not a licensed financial advisor. These are personal opinions. As you see fit, consult a licensed advisor.)
Relationships
Especially when young, the heart and hormones can lead to unwise decisions that cause great pain. Easy for me to say, but try to made decisions based both on head and heart. Be with people who bring out the best in you and who don’t require undue effort to make the relationship work. If you make a mistake, cut your losses with a clean break. And if you’re dumped, try to believe it’s for the best: Sure, see if there are lessons to be learned but try to cut short the recriminations and recognize that there are a lot of fish in the sea. There are, among the frogs, princes and princesses.
Eating
When you’re young, you feel you can get away with bad eating habits. And you can—for a while. But habits established when young are harder to break and they become ever more consequential. As your metabolism and amount of exercise slow, the same eating that kept your weight reasonable in your 20s could make you unhealthy later — with scary consequences. Best eating advice is to stay conscious before and during eating, asking yourself: Is this worth the calories?
Exercise
The best exercise is one you’ll stay with. It’s unlikely that buying an exercise machine or joining a gym (a modern-day torture chamber) will keep you on the straight and narrow. Most gym memberships go largely unused and home exercise machines get used mainly as clothes racks. So what do you enjoy? Basketball? Hiking? By yourself? With a friend?
Many young people unconsciously consider their body impervious to abuse. So I don’t have the hubris to think that writing a few lines here will have much impact, That said, I'd be remiss if I didn’t urge you to try to be cool and to avoid boredom not with body-abusing substances but with such activities as a creative outlet or trying to make the world better.
The meaning of life
As just implied, the life well-led is about spending lots of time trying to improve the world or your sphere of influence: your friends, co-workers, parents, and in the work you do for money or as a volunteer. Every time you decide, Netflix or volunteer? Vape or help a friend? Party or work?, ask yourself, “What would my best self do?”
I read this aloud on YouTube.
