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ADHD

Living an Unmasked ADHD Life

Learn how to embrace your true self beyond ADHD masking.

Key points

  • Masking involves concealing ADHD symptoms through learned behaviors, often to blend in and avoid judgment.
  • While masking can offer temporary relief, it can also lead to emotional burnout and mental health strain.
  • There are strategies for overcoming ADHD masking and developing healthier ways to cope.

Living with ADHD presents unique challenges, and one that often flies under the radar is masking.

Masking involves concealing ADHD symptoms through learned behaviors, often as a way to blend in socially and avoid judgment. In this post, we'll explore what ADHD masking is, how it impacts individuals, and how to develop healthier coping strategies that promote authenticity.

Understanding ADHD Masking

ADHD masking refers to the act of hiding symptoms by mimicking behaviors that align with "neurotypical" expectations. This can vary widely from person to person, but it often includes suppressing impulsivity, hyperactivity, and inattentiveness while trying to appear focused, organized, and composed. Examples of masking might include staying quiet to avoid drawing attention, overcompensating for forgetfulness, or suppressing natural habits like fidgeting.

Examples of ADHD Masking

  • Staying quiet in group settings to avoid interrupting or appearing hyperactive
  • Constantly checking belongings to prevent losing them, which hides struggles with executive functioning
  • Feigning interest in conversations or activities to blend in
  • Overpreparing for tasks to counteract time management difficulties
  • Avoiding eye contact or stimming behaviors to seem more composed

The Impact of ADHD Masking

While masking can offer temporary relief, it often comes at a significant cost:

  • Delayed Diagnosis: Masking can obscure ADHD symptoms, leading to delays in diagnosis and access to proper support.
  • Mental Health Strain: The effort to maintain a facade can increase anxiety, depression, and feelings of inadequacy.
  • Emotional Burnout: Constantly suppressing your true self can lead to emotional exhaustion and burnout.
  • Relationship Struggles: Masking may strain relationships as others may not fully understand the internal challenges, leading to feelings of isolation.

Overcoming ADHD Masking

While masking may seem like a necessary strategy, it’s crucial to develop healthier ways to cope and embrace your authentic self:

  • Increase Self-Awareness: Recognize when you're masking and understand how it impacts your well-being.
  • Seek Professional Support: Work with a therapist or coach who specializes in ADHD to help manage symptoms and challenges.
  • Consider ADHD Coaching: ADHD coaching can provide personalized strategies, structure, and accountability to manage symptoms more effectively.
  • Connect With Others: Join ADHD group coaching or online communities to share experiences, gain validation, and learn from others facing similar challenges.
  • Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and embrace your true self. ADHD is part of who you are, not something to hide.

For many years, I struggled with masking my ADHD, feeling the need to hide my quirks to fit in. It wasn’t until I sought therapy, engaged in ADHD coaching, and connected with supportive communities that I realized I wasn’t alone. Embracing my authentic self, ADHD and all, has been a journey of self-discovery and empowerment, allowing me to live more openly and authentically.

ADHD masking is a common but often misunderstood part of living with the condition. By understanding what masking is, recognizing its effects, and developing strategies to cope more healthily, you can navigate your ADHD journey with greater resilience and authenticity. Remember, you're not alone, and there is support available to help you unmask and thrive with ADHD.

References

Kosaka, H., Fujioka, T. & Jung, M. Symptoms in individuals with adult-onset ADHD are masked during childhood. Eur Arch Psychiatry Clin Neurosci 269, 753–755 (2019).

Ai, W., Cunningham, W. A., & Lai, M.-C. (2022). Reconsidering autistic ‘camouflaging’ as transactional impression management. Trends in Cognitive Sciences, 26(8), 631–645.

American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.). American Psychiatric Association.

Bargiela, S., Steward, R., & Mandy, W. (2016). The experiences of late-diagnosed women with autism spectrum conditions: An investigation of the female autism phenotype. Journal of Autism and Developmental Disorders, 46(10), 3281–3294.

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