So Fake, She's Real

Janice Dickinson

Profession: Writer, Reality TV Star, Modeling Agency Proprietress

Claim to Eccentricity: Calls herself the World's first Supermodel

Janice Dickinson, single mother of two teenagers and covergirl-turned-reality-TV-icon, completely lacks a conversation filter—a bankable quality in our confessional culture. Has she fabricated her brash diva character to stay in show business? Or is she truly histrionic? When she's not self-aggrandizing, Dickinson comes off as a wounded bird in her candid, insightful memoirs of a horrendous childhood and subsequent battles against controlling men and alcoholism. Her 2006 book (her first two were best-sellers) is a humorous advice manual, Check, Please! How to Pick Up Boys… & Dump Them When You're Done (Regan Books). She appears on America's Next Top Model, the Tyra Banks-hosted contest that spurred her comeback, and stars in a Bravo show documenting the launch of her eponymous modeling agency.

Q: How would you describe your on-air persona to readers who haven't seen you?

I'm angry! I'm not Zen at all. I scream. I'm angry at an industry that I've been involved with for 32 years.

Why are you angry at the business?

I've been at the helm of a roller coaster; I've made five comebacks. They still won't let me hang up my heels. I see a lot of inequality, racism. But modeling is one of the most cutthroat businesses.

I don't edit what I say. I talk about the plastic surgery and I discuss the photo retouching, that everything you see in a magazine is a complete facade. I've been fooling the public all these years! And it's wrong—it gives people the wrong image.

But then why do you continue to get plastic surgery?

No, no. It's just maintenance and upkeep with Botox and Restalyn. It allows me to have a youthful appearance on television when the whole fucking thing is youth-oriented. I'm a 900-year-old dinosaur and believe me, without 14 inches of makeup, 32 pounds of fake weave… I'm the only one who's talking about all of this.

Does it bother you that you're seen as bitchy?

People refer to me as "that bitch from America's Next Top Model" because the network wanted me to be the negative to Tyra Banks' positive. They'd say, "Meaner, meaner, meaner." And I would say, "No, no, no." Then I'd go home and cry. I have to work to support my children. It's mandatory. So, that's the way it is.

How would your kids describe you at home?

Just plain "Mom." There's always a roast in the oven. There are always cookies and cakes being baked. There are always fresh flowers and ambience with attitude and candles. My house is spotless. Maybe I have a compulsive disorder. I've coddled my children to a point where maybe I've stunted their development by running around and picking up after everybody.

Did you feel you have to overcompensate for having been neglected by your parents as a child?

You nailed it. I overcompensate with everything. Before the sun comes up my daughter's homework has been double-checked, her breakfast is laid out. I've already gone up to Starbucks and read four papers. I'm full-throttle.

You wrote in your first book that you had to work very hard just to appear normal, because you were so anxious and ashamed of yourself thanks to your chaotic childhood and shaky self-esteem. How did you manage to do that?

The philosophy I adopted is, "Act as if." Act as if you're in a good mood, and you'll be in a good mood. Act as if you're normal, maybe you'll adapt.

Given your dynamism, was it difficult for you to be contemplative and write books?

It was incredibly hard—but I needed to get rid of the gargoyles that had been chasing me for 39 years.

Since you've been so open about your own upbringing, I was surprised to read your advice to not talk about your family or let a man talk about his while on dates.

Well, it's better not to get that information up front. Just be yourself and see if you gel. See if you have soul-mate potential. I still haven't found that contentment.

You've said you had a split personality as a young woman—terribly insecure and then superconfident. Are you still swinging between those two extremes?

No. I take daily inventories. If I've been really rude, if I've hung up on someone, I'll call back and say, "I'm really sorry. I was having a rough moment."

How does that help quell your insecurities?

I'm still insecure, but it makes me a better person. I don't hear that voice of my father saying "You're not good enough" anymore. I still sometimes get lonely. But the minute I get out of my head and do something for someone who has less than me, that's when I feel better.