Complicated Love

Adverse Childhood Experiences

Echoes of the Past

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on October 21, 2024

Are your love relationships hard to explain? Do you tend to break up impulsively? Does he avoid commitment? Is she like the mother who caused you pain? Here's why and how to stop.

Are your love relationships hard to explain? Do you tend to break up impulsively? Does he avoid commitment? Is she like the mother who caused you pain? Here's why and how to stop.

Relationships

Stuck in a Toxic Relationship?

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on September 30, 2024

Why people stay in perpetually conflicted, even abusive relationships and how can they break free, whether or not they decide to leave.

Why people stay in perpetually conflicted, even abusive relationships and how can they break free, whether or not they decide to leave.

Gratitude

Reframing Romantic Breakups

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on May 27, 2024

While romantic breakups can be devastating, they can also be reframed as opportunities for growth, gratitude, and new insight.

While romantic breakups can be devastating, they can also be reframed as opportunities for growth, gratitude, and new insight.

Relationships

Relationship Resentment

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on April 22, 2024

Resentment can have a corrosive effect on love. Reflection, communication, and gratitude are key to preserving it.

Resentment can have a corrosive effect on love. Reflection, communication, and gratitude are key to preserving it.

Relationships

Why Writing Letters Can Help Couples Rediscover Love

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on March 25, 2024

If you're at an impasse with a partner but want to resolve your differences, writing a letter can help spark new connection and hope in challenging times.

If you're at an impasse with a partner but want to resolve your differences, writing a letter can help spark new connection and hope in challenging times.

Relationships

8 Reasons Someone Can Feel Disliked

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on February 26, 2024

If you feel disliked, others may have good reason to keep their distance. Some of these can't be changed but some can.

If you feel disliked, others may have good reason to keep their distance. Some of these can't be changed but some can.

Relationships

7 Phrases That Enhance Your Communication

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on January 29, 2024

When it comes to growing in love and making that love last, words matter. What you say and how you say it can make a critical difference in whether you grow together or apart.

When it comes to growing in love and making that love last, words matter. What you say and how you say it can make a critical difference in whether you grow together or apart.

Forgiveness

Breaking Free of Grudges

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on October 27, 2023

Holding grudges can keep one mired in anger, resentment and bitterness for years, negatively impacting other relationships, one's quality of life and even one's physical health.

Holding grudges can keep one mired in anger, resentment and bitterness for years, negatively impacting other relationships, one's quality of life and even one's physical health.

Relationships

Psychospeak: How and Why to Stop This Communication Blocker

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on September 25, 2023

A new communication blocker—with partners labeling each other with psychiatric diagnoses or terms—is in evidence these days. Do you do this? Here's why and how to stop.

A new communication blocker—with partners labeling each other with psychiatric diagnoses or terms—is in evidence these days. Do you do this? Here's why and how to stop.

Relationships

6 Love Myths That Can Lead to Misery

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on August 28, 2023

Love is a leap of faith, but sometimes optimism is misplaced. What beliefs feed into love myths that can lead to misery? And what decisions can lead to lasting love?

Love is a leap of faith, but sometimes optimism is misplaced. What beliefs feed into love myths that can lead to misery? And what decisions can lead to lasting love?

Anger

When Words Fail: 5 Ways to Tame Out-of-Control Conflict

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on July 31, 2023

Words can fail as anger escalates and communication-blocking habits fuel fury rather than resolution. Consider these tips for keeping conflict productive.

Words can fail as anger escalates and communication-blocking habits fuel fury rather than resolution. Consider these tips for keeping conflict productive.

Relationships

8 Secrets to Lasting Love

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on June 8, 2023

The secrets of making love last through years and decades aren't always obvious, but they show that small things can make a big difference.

The secrets of making love last through years and decades aren't always obvious, but they show that small things can make a big difference.

Friends

5 Hacks for Holiday Disaster Prevention

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on December 11, 2022

Dreading the holidays due to problem relatives, overwhelming expectations, or clashing celebration styles? This year can be different.

Dreading the holidays due to problem relatives, overwhelming expectations, or clashing celebration styles? This year can be different.

Friends

7 Tips for Building Friendships to Last a Lifetime

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on November 8, 2022

What's the secret of keeping and nurturing lifelong friendships? They don't just happen; it takes effort.

What's the secret of keeping and nurturing lifelong friendships? They don't just happen; it takes effort.

Relationships

When You Loathe Your Adult Child's New Love

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on October 10, 2022

Is your daughter's new boyfriend your worst nightmare? Is your son's girlfriend the antithesis of your dream for his lasting love? Here's what to do to show love and avoid estrangement.

Is your daughter's new boyfriend your worst nightmare? Is your son's girlfriend the antithesis of your dream for his lasting love? Here's what to do to show love and avoid estrangement.

Marriage

9 Reasons Why Many Miserable Marriages Survive

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on September 6, 2022

We've all seen marriages of quiet desperation. Why and how do people endure decades of misery? And what are the breaking points that enable some to escape?

We've all seen marriages of quiet desperation. Why and how do people endure decades of misery? And what are the breaking points that enable some to escape?

Relationships

7 Signs of Doom in a Relationship

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on August 29, 2022

Relationships in trouble can look, at first glance, very much alike. But there are some differences between marriages that weather a difficult time and those that are doomed.

Relationships in trouble can look, at first glance, very much alike. But there are some differences between marriages that weather a difficult time and those that are doomed.

Sex

Sex Education in a Post-Roe World

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on July 22, 2022

In this post-Roe world, making wise sexual choices is even more important. How do you give your teenager the tools to make responsible, life-affirming choices?

In this post-Roe world, making wise sexual choices is even more important. How do you give your teenager the tools to make responsible, life-affirming choices?

Jealousy

5 Ways to Keep Jealousy From Destroying Love

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on February 22, 2022

Is jealousy sabotaging your relationships? Are you wondering why it happens and what you can do? Here are some tips for taming jealousy so your love can thrive.

Is jealousy sabotaging your relationships? Are you wondering why it happens and what you can do? Here are some tips for taming jealousy so your love can thrive.

Friends

4 Reasons for Lost Friendships

Kathy McCoy Ph.D. on March 30, 2021

Why do some friendships fade while others last a lifetime? Here are some common reasons friendships end, as well as what to do when a friend is in trouble or lost.

Why do some friendships fade while others last a lifetime? Here are some common reasons friendships end, as well as what to do when a friend is in trouble or lost.