Why Motivation Is Not the Key to Success

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In the journey toward achievement, motivation may come and go, but willpower remains a constant driving force. It is the resilience to navigate through difficulties, make sacrifices, and adhere to a chosen path despite the absence of immediate rewards. Ultimately, willpower transforms aspirations into tangible results, making it a more enduring and reliable force for continued success.

Every day offers a chance for positive change. As someone working in the field of psychology, I find myself at the forefront of guiding individuals through their challenges, whether it involves confronting deep-seated traumas or reshaping daily routines. But I've come to realize that while I can offer support and encouragement, the real drive has to come from within. Regrettably, I often must candidly convey that I cannot single-handedly drive a client’s journey.

Recently, a profound insight from poet John O’Donoghue resonated deeply with me. He states: “One of the most beautiful gifts in the world is the gift of encouragement. When someone encourages you, that person helps you over a threshold you might otherwise never have crossed on your own.” This sentiment captures the essence of motivation, a force that propels individuals toward their goals, yet relying on motivation alone may lead someone to falter in the face of persistent challenges.

Motivation, defined as the impetus directing behaviour towards specific objectives, is undeniably powerful in getting us started. Like that initial spark that pushes people to initiate, remain in their efforts, and achieve their desired results. However, like a flickering flame susceptible to gusts of wind, motivation fades in the presence of emotional turbulence or other external factors. Its transient nature renders it easily swayed making it unreliable for the long haul.

Enter willpower. Unlike motivation, which can come and go, willpower is like a steady guiding light through rough times. It helps us stay on track, even when external factors try to derail us.

In her research, psychologist Kelly McGonigal explains that willpower comes in different forms, from resisting temptation to enduring hardships and staying focused on long-term goals. It's what helps us resist immediate gratification and build resilience.

Before embarking on any journey, whether personal or therapeutic, it's important to assess not just motivation but also the depth of one's will. In therapy, for example, clients may exhibit surface-level enthusiasm, yet a deeper analysis often reveals the underlying strength of their will to persevere.

How Can You Gauge Your Own Willpower?

Do you ever find yourself harbouring desires without taking the necessary steps to fulfill them? Perhaps there's a lingering ambition you've yet to act upon. What barriers prevent you from doing so? Here are a couple of tell-tale signs that your will is not onboard.

1. Are you rationalizing, or trying to talk yourself out of it?

Through my professional experience, I've observed a common trend: Many individuals possess the skill to rationalize themselves out of pursuing their aspirations.

I was once assisting a young woman whose objective was to break free from a pattern of self-sacrifice—she consistently prioritized the needs of others over her own, often resulting in feelings of exploitation. Upon closer examination, we uncovered a significant obstacle: Whenever she contemplated making choices for her well-being, she immediately labeled them as "selfish."

This label triggered an internal dialogue where she meticulously listed reasons to dissuade herself from taking action. After all, who aspires to be perceived as selfish? Ironically, when it came to considering the needs of others, she effortlessly compiled justifications for giving her all, even at the expense of her basic necessities.

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2. Are you non-commital or dealing with ambivalence?

Another major obstacle I've noticed for individuals who struggle to achieve their goals is a lack of deep-seated commitment, or what is referred to as indecision. Indecision is, of course, the inability or reluctance to make a decision. It often occurs when a person feels torn between different options, unsure of which choice to make or fearing the potential consequences of their decision.

An example of this arose with one client who was grappling with the desire to end an intimate relationship they felt was exploitative. Despite recognizing the need for change, they found themselves entangled by the shared responsibilities of parenthood and the minimal benefits they had traded for tangible consequences.

Upon delving deeper into their intentions, their language often betrayed a hesitancy to commit fully; expressions like "I kind of want to try to leave them," "I wish they would end the relationship," "I'll probably do it next month," "I guess," or "I think" revealed a pattern of procrastination.

It became evident that their unconscious thoughts were manifesting through their words. Only when this ambivalence was gently pointed out did they acknowledge their true reluctance to move forward. They had been under the illusion of genuine determination for some time. Once this realization dawned, their frustrations began to subside as they became more conscious of the choices they were making.

In conclusion, by understanding the dynamics of motivation and willpower, individuals can navigate challenges more effectively and achieve their desired outcomes. The true key to sustained success lies in willpower, a committed force that guides individuals through challenges and keeps them on track toward their goals. External encouragement may provide temporary boosts, but intrinsic determination is essential for long-term progress.

Recognizing signs of rationalization and indecision can help individuals assess the depth of their will and overcome obstacles that may hinder their journey toward success. By harnessing the enduring power of will, individuals can navigate setbacks, resist immediate gratification, and build the resilience needed to achieve their aspirations.