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Key points
- Uncertainty and fear of the unknown keep many of us from living life to the fullest.
- Only from venturing into the unknown can we benefit from its opportunities.
- The stress of uncertainty can be harnessed into adaptive energy to help us seize opportunities we did not know were even there.
As we begin a new year, we make resolutions that this year will be better or more satisfying than the last one. According to The Washington Post and others, however, 80 percent of people fail in their resolutions by February, with only 9 percent ultimately following through to complete a resolution. Why is it that so many people hesitate to attempt something new? Why do so many people stay in unsatisfying jobs, even in a favorable job market? Why do people frequently stay in unrewarding and even abusive interpersonal relationships? In short, why do many people miss out on living life to the fullest?
While there are no simple answers to these questions, one common denominator is that they all necessitate change with some substantial degree of uncertainty. Simply said, many, if not most, people do not like uncertainty and the unknown, and thus they resist change of any kind, even if it's for the better. In doing so, they deprive themselves of all the opportunities the unknown holds. And yet, hiding within the unknown are the opportunities that make life even more worth living. Let's take a closer look.
What Is Uncertainty?
One of the most potentially vexing, as well as rewarding, of all the psychological states is that of uncertainty. Uncertainty may be defined as a state of the unknown or the unpredictable. Virginia Satir once famously noted that people prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty.
While a few of us gravitate to the unknown, others live in fear of it. Uncertainty makes us feel vulnerable because it's outside of our control. And a sense of control, even if it is an illusion, is important to most of us.
Uncertainty can be the "creeping dread" that will not change the future but can certainly take the joy out of the present. But it is that dread that robs us of the opportunities the unknown may reveal. Lewis Carroll once said, "In the end, we only regret the chances we didn't take, relationships we were afraid to have, and the decisions we waited too long to make." We desire to wait for the moment of absolute certainty, but that moment seldom comes other than in retrospect. Sadly, an opportunity is often sacrificed when waiting for that moment.
Why Is Uncertainty Important?
Uncertainty is highly correlated psychologically with fear and anxiety and behaviorally with indecision, procrastination, hesitation, and behavioral "paralysis." To better understand uncertainty, it may be helpful to analyze the state of certainty. Certainty is a state of conviction, resoluteness, confidence, and certitude. The payoffs for certainty are decisiveness, action, and, most importantly, an underlying sense of safety. Certainty makes us feel safe and secure. Uncertainty breeds fear, anxiety, and insecurity. Even if it represents stagnation, the status quo yields safety from the unpredictable, hence Satir's correct observation that people prefer the certainty of misery to the misery of uncertainty.
So important is the need for certainty and predictability that human beings actually possess a biological warning system that constantly scans the environment for cues that signal conditions of uncertainty, violated expectancies, and other potential threats. When lived experiences do not match the expectations (called a "mismatch"), the septohippocampal complex initiates patterns of hesitancy coupled with a vulnerability to excessive stress (aka the fight-or-flight response). The results can be paralyzing fear, anxiety, or even panic attacks.
So, we clearly see that the human brain has a biological bias which serves to protect us against the unknown. But that same protective bias can rob us of the experience of living life to its fullest. If we can learn to tolerate the initial fear and vulnerability associated with uncertainty, we can avail ourselves of the potential that the unknown holds—and all that life has to offer.
Breaking Through the Barrier of Uncertainty
Greek mythology, European folk tales, and the Stoic philosophers help us navigate uncertainty. To begin, let us keep in mind the aphorism "life is a journey, not a destination." Ralph Waldo Emerson once noted, "To finish the moment, to find the journey's end in every step of the road, to live the greatest number of good hours, is wisdom."
To navigate the journey of life most effectively, remembering the Greek god Proteus can be useful. Proteus was the eldest son of Poseidon. He is most known for his ability to change his shape so as to take advantage of each life experience, no matter its nature. Proteus could not predict all of the situations he would encounter, but he could adapt to them. In doing so, he could reap the benefits of the entirety of life. Adaptability in times of great change and uncertainty is key.
Your attitude matters. The 1884 Grimms' fairytale "The Story of the Youth Who Went Forth to Learn What Fear Was" tells of a boy who repeatedly finds himself in potentially frightening situations yet never experiences fear. This fairytale causes us to reconsider our preconceived notion that fear and anxiety are necessary and inescapable consequences of uncertainty or the unknown. Writing in "Meditations," Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius urged us to control what we can and cope with the rest, keeping in mind the only thing we actually can control is how to react to the world as it unfolds around us.
Harness the stress of uncertainty and turn it into what Dr. Hans Selye called "adaptive energy." Going forth on the adventure of life armed with excitement, rather than dread, for what the unknown may reveal is not only exhilarating, it's proof that we are truly alive and in the moment—living life to the fullest.
© 2023, George S. Everly, Jr., Ph.D.
References
Selye, H. (1956). The Stress of Life. NY: Basic.
