Are Women Worse Bullies Than Men?

Queen Bee behavior

Women at work can be just as successful as men, we know. Yet, media portrayals tend to emphasize the downside of having women perform in such stereotypically masculine roles. Books and movies such as The Devil Wears Prada, news features and research results reveal and emphasize the ways in which successful women working in different sectors show aggressive behavior and bully their co-workers, putting down and putting off other women in particular.

‘Queen Bee behavior’ is a term often used to indicate such conduct, referring to animal communities where the needs of a single female are met by many other male and female workers. Is this a valid analogy? Do these women bully others to discourage potential competitors? And are women at work more likely to do this than men? During the past years, we have conducted a program of research to examine these issues. Let’s see what the evidence says.

What do we know about workplace bullying?

Several efforts have been made to analyze what workplace bullying is, and to document what we know about its occurrence. There are many ways in which people can display aggression at work. Stealing other people’s ideas, work resources, or clients, intimidating them to comply with requests, ignoring or continually criticizing their contributions, or ridiculing their ambitions or achievements all qualify as examples of workplace aggression or bullying. The occurrence of such misbehavior harms the performance, well-being and physical health of those targeted. It can also undermine the motivation and work engagement of those witnessing such behavior in their place of work. Even if such behaviors may not always be prevented, things become particularly problematic when targets do not feel free to confront the bully. For instance, because the bully is a person they depend on for a favorable evaluation or important opportunities, such as their boss at work, or their mentor in a small professional community. The fear of damaging one’s professional prospects when confronting the bully or leaving the situation can cause such dysfunctional work patterns to continue over many years.

Are women more likely to bully than men?

The simple answer to this question is “no.” The current reality is that people holding positions of power and control over others in the workplace are more likely to be men than women. Accordingly, studies generally reveal that 60-75% of those who bully others in the workplace are men, while 60-75% of the targets are women. Yet, women in power can also aggress or harass other women that depend on them, as media examples continue to show.

Why would women not support each other?

If so few women are in positions of power, why would they not support other women and help them succeed? Are women particularly keen to discourage and undermine female competitors? Studies reveal this is not the case. Workplace experiences, not gender, can elicit aggressive behavior among women. Indeed, some of the ‘female bullies’ indicate that they simply modeled their aggressive leadership style after the behavior they were subjected to by their own mentors.

A highly masculine and aggressive work climate constitutes an important risk factor in this respect. The combination of a workplace that has low expectations of female leadership and the presence of very few female leaders who embody the exception to this rule creates an environment that is particularly toxic.

Evaluating women on the basis of gendered expectations rather than their individual merits and achievements prompts those who try to advance at work to demonstrate they are different than other women. Clarifying in this way that the gender stereotype does not apply to them, seems a valid strategy for these women to secure their own career opportunities. Yet, an unfortunate byproduct is that it becomes even more difficult—also for them—to acknowledge and appreciate the contributions and ambitions of other women in the workplace—especially those who behave in more stereotypically feminine ways.

How to prevent this?

Different studies convincingly show that female displays of competitive and aggressive behaviors and a reluctance to support other women do not reflect a generic tendency of how women relate to each other in the workplace. Instead, this is clearly related to discriminatory workplace experiences, that communicate a lack of confidence in the professional abilities of women and a lack of support for women who aspire to advance in their career.

Why then do the incidents of female bullying stand out so much and speak to our imagination? And, more importantly, what can be done to prevent this?

Studies reveal that women and men do not really differ in the behavior they display once they have achieved positions of leadership. However, competitive and aggressive behaviors stand out more when displayed by women. This seems particularly inappropriate, in view of the stereotype that women should show empathy, care, and help others, also at work. While competitive and aggressive workplace behavior may be more easily accepted or even expected from men, this doesn’t mean it is unproblematic.

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In fact, time and again studies have revealed that highly aggressive work climates—in which workers are expected to compete with each other and only one type of contribution is valued and rewarded—can invite a range of problematic work behaviors, including bullying, sabotage, cheating, and fraud. This damages the psychological well-being, physical health, work motivation, and task performance of male as well as female workers. Securing a more cooperative and supportive work climate helps deflect such problems. Avoiding that women are exposed to gender discrimination in the workplace is the most effective way to prevent the emergence of female bullying.