Happiness
Increasing Happiness Through Shifting Perspectives
Three practical exercises to help gain perspective and find humor.
Posted April 30, 2018
Mark Twain is purported to have said “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.” We have come to expect that the world will behave certain ways. When the good things we want fall away, we feel betrayed and worry we might never rebound. Yet most often, the worst of what we fear, never happens. Or when it does, we discover we are stronger than we expected. We realize the things we dreaded were are not as bad as we thought or did not last as long. Be attentive and vigilant and patient. But recognize there is never any reason to fret. Importantly, if we can pay attention to the broader context of our lives, we might even find humor. In the miscues and cosmic rumblings, we might just see how human and silly we have been to expect that the ceaseless universe might be attentive to our expectations and wishes. If you can do this, the world will never hurt you in lasting ways. If you can do this, you will find the joy, playfulness and transcendence endemic to a human life. Here are three, practical things you can do to help gain perspective and find humor.
Hold on to Role Models. Think of someone, real or imagined, who displays qualities you admire. Or memorize a quote that states a truth you want to remember. Let it sink into you deeply. Whenever you need it, bring this person or passage to mind. You will find there, the understanding and insight you need. This is what people do when they ask themselves “What would Jesus do? Or, when something is hard, project yourself forward in time, maybe five years, maybe ten, and then look backwards. How would your future-self see things differently? What insights or guidance would you offer yourself?
Go As Far As You Can See. When something bad happens, or you are dealing with something difficult, stop, take 3 – 5 full breaths and regain your center. Recognize that for every bad thing you discovered, there are innumerable facts and futures about which you are unaware. Keep looking for whatever else the universe provides that you can hold on to. It is like walking in a thick fog. Go as far as you can see, and then you will always be able to see farther.
![Laughing Baby available via the Creative Commons Laughing Baby available via the Creative Commons](https://cdn.psychologytoday.com/sites/default/files/styles/article-inline-half/public/field_blog_entry_images/2018-04/laughing_baby.jpg?itok=Um6eP2wu)
Find the Humor. Actively look for the humor of all around you. Nothing hurtful or judgmental. Only the gentle, playful and goodhearted. Once you start looking, you will find it everywhere.
Happiness Field Manual. These are just three strategies for enhancing well-being excerpted from the Happiness Field Manual. Some will have a stronger effect than others. Some will last longer. Not every exercise will work for every person, all the time. There are also complexities and subtleties to each that are not addressed in this short post. The complete Happiness Field Manual is available for free at www.JohnSeanDoyle.com.
References
Doyle, J. Sean (2018) The Happiness Field Manual. Raleigh, NC. Rainstick Press. Available for free this May at www.JohnSeanDoyle.com.