Infidelity Therapists in Santa Barbara County, CA

Welcome to my practice. I have been in practice since 2007 and have been featured on ABC, NBC, and KCAL as an expert psychologist. I work primarily with men who have hit “rock bottom” and would like help getting up. These men are often in crisis when we first meet. The issues I address are typically related to unhealthy sexual behaviors, infidelity, financial recklessness, gambling, drugs/alcohol, dishonesty/lying, and relational conflicts. My therapy approach is a combination of psychoanalytic, cognitive-behavioral, and the 12-Step recovery model. I also share insight from my own painful but redemptive recovery journey.

Using warmth and empathy, I provide a safe space for you to explore how to strengthen your sense of self and your intimate relationships, enabling you to heal and grow authentically. My approach is supportive and direct with an emphasis on your needs, values, and experiences. I offer compassionate support to individuals and couples facing relationship difficulties, adjusting to challenging life transitions, or hoping to improve mental well-being. My goal is to guide you to understand, accept, and express your emotions by gaining personal insight, improving relationships, and exploring life’s concerns, conflicts, and contradictions.

Infidelity and Betrayal Trauma leaves us feeling hopeless, defeated, and angry. Maybe you’re someone who has always said infidelity is a “dealbreaker” but now find yourself facing this with your partner, hoping it isn’t actually the dealbreaker you’ve always known it to be. You may be experiencing symptoms of anxiety, depression, or searching for solutions after an affair that has left you feeling hopeless and out of control. But you’re ready to move forward. You’re ready to take one step forward, toward healing. Most of all, you’re ready to be on the other side of this seemingly insurmountable hill, I want to help you get there.

As your therapist, I strive to empower you to overcome personal challenges, activate your inner resources, develop a deeper level of trust in your self and your inherent potential, and reclaim ownership of your life and purpose. I have an affinity for working with clients seeking to transform their lives and enhance their relationships with themselves, others, and the natural world. Improved emotional intelligence, mindful self-awareness, communication skills, trauma and grief processing---will support you in developing self-compassion, eliminating personal obstacles, coping with your daily life, and finding a more balanced, attuned, and connected way of being.

-- I Provide Telephone Therapy & Videoconference Sessions -- I work best with motivated adults who are committed to working on clearly identified psychological and relationship problems. My clients have tried to solve issues on their own but eventually recognize a need for professional assistance. They realize that therapists have no magical quick cures and that treatment takes courage, persistence and risk-taking. My clients learn that seeking help is a strength, not a weakness. They develop trust in the therapeutic relationship and make lasting gains. I honor each one.

If the relationship you are in is struggling, if you feel alone or as if you keep having the same fight, if you are struggling with some type of betrayal or anger  I can help.  In your first sessions we will discover the things that are holding your relationship back from being what you thought it could be when you first met. As we work together I will help you identify where new skills are needed and get you headed toward the relationship you have been longing for.  

Welcome to my practice! I’m Annie Finch, a licensed marriage and family therapist dedicated to helping individuals and couples navigate life's challenges with empathy and insight. My approach is grounded in creating a safe and trusting space where you can explore and heal. In our sessions, you can expect a supportive space where your concerns are heard and validated. I aim to empower you with practical strategies and deeper insights to help you overcome challenges and foster resilience. My approach is rooted in the belief that every person has the capacity for growth and change, and I’m here to support you every step of the way.

Feeling stuck, lonely, depressed, anxious, fearful, unfulfilled, or going through a life transition? You're not alone...we all have to face life's challenges! I believe true change & growth require a willingness to take risks. Resiliency & self-trust are strengthened by facing & moving through adversity. Together, we can explore & map out a plan so you can take that leap of faith, try something new, face your fear, or learn to accept the things outside your control. Life can be hard at times...with insight, the right tools, supportive relationships, & a little courage you can get through almost anything & live a fulfilled life!

I specialize in Couples and Individual Counseling in service of relationship issues. The goal of counseling is to enhance communication that will build trust and emotional safety in the distressed relationship or a desire to learn communication to enhance a loving bond. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is the therapeutic protocol I utilize to enhance communication skills to deescalate the pain and fear that arises from not being seen or understood by your partner. EFT helps deescalate feelings of "I do not matter", "I'm not important" "I can never get it right" these difficult thoughts trigger fears of abandonment or rejection.

Are you and your partner fighting more? Do you feel distant and disconnected, lonely and truly concerned about the state of your partnership? Has infidelity got you feeling angry, depressed or anxious and is this getting in the way of your daily life, depriving you of any joy and happiness? It's time to reach out and get some professional help because trying to figure out these kinds of difficulties can be a daunting task when undertaken alone or when trying to clear out the cobwebs that make resolving partnership issues feel insurmountable. Get the help you need...now!

Do you notice that unresolved trauma and codependency is negatively affecting you and your relationships? Are you ready to begin healing symptoms such as flashbacks, hyperawareness, disassociation, people pleasing, trust issues, depending on others to make decisions, and unclear boundaries? Have you tried talk therapy and still feel stuck? You’re in the right place. My practice is specialized in helping adults and couples heal from trauma and break patterns of codependency through a unique somatic approach that brings your mind, body, and spirit into your healing process. The healing you seek begins with the wisdom of your body.

I work with individuals and couples in the areas of sex, relationships, sex addiction, and life transitions (divorce, empty nest, retirement). Relationships with others (partner, employer, siblings, friends, clients) are a central source of meaning and sometimes difficulty for us. I can work with you around relationship issues, including commitment, communication, sexuality, infidelity and healthy conflict. I'm also offering groups for women and couples wanting to unlock their sexual satisfaction.

Do you feel overwhelmed by the pain & confusion of a relationship that should have brought you joy? Maybe you've endured the trauma of a crime, the gaslighting of narcissistic abuse, or the deep wounds of betrayal. Maybe you are struggling with divorce or memories of childhood trauma. Even though anxiety & depression are normal responses to such circumstances, there is still hope that things can be different. Together, we can navigate these turbulent emotions & find a path toward healing, strength, & renewal. Getting help today will allow you to live a life filled with peace & meaningful connections.

If you are seeking help for your relationship, it's probably because things feel distant, disconnected, or even out of control. You feel like you can't communicate no matter how hard you try. You are tired of arguing. You want to feel close again but don't know where to begin. Maybe you don't recognize yourselves after you had children and day-to-day family life feels overwhelming and joyless. Maybe you've experienced a betrayal and are so filled with sadness and rage you don't recognize yourself anymore. You want to fix things but are afraid of the pain. Perhaps you made a mistake and need help regaining your partner's trust.

I am a California licensed psychologist with over four decades of experience. I specialize in anxiety disorders, eating disorders, and relationship issues. Most of my work is with couples and I have had extensive education, training and experience. To date I have worked with over a thousand couples. My work is with relationships that I work with couples, individuals, all ethnicities and cultures, and couples gay and straight. I work with premarital counseling, infidelity, divorce prevention, and couples who simply want more satisfaction in their relationship.

Are you or your partner seeking to improve your relationship, resolve conflicts, or deepen your connection? I specialize in helping couples navigate the complexities of relationships in a safe & supportive environment. Services include pre-marital counseling and support for couples in crisis that are dealing with infidelity, separation, and/or parenting issues. I offer evidence based strategies to resolve disagreements, reduce tension, rebuild trust, intimacy & emotional connection. How? By learning about different love languages, emotional triggers, effective time out and self soothing strategies leading to healthier relationship.

Have you experienced trauma, anxiety, depression, or negative self-worth? Have you become stuck in negative patterns of poor self-care, disordered eating, or interpersonal relationships that are draining or even abusive? I have dedicated my practice to helping others heal and break free from negative cycles of abuse - both within and outside oneself.

I believe that the strength of our relationships shapes how fulfilling our lives are. I specialize in working with couples who are facing transitions and/or conflict in their relationship and individuals who struggle with relationships and their sense of self. Together, we will work towards deeper understanding and freedom from negative and/or destructive repetitions that impact your life and relationships.

My couples clients are very brave because they want to do what it takes to change. We practice kindness and truth, compassion and accountability.I am a relationship coach and therapist. I have been working with couples for 35 years. I now work a model, Relational Life Therapy, that is new, cutting edge, powerful and effective. I offer an intensive, brief therapy program, focusing on individual and relational attitudes and behaviors.trained to do this I use in office, ZOOM, or Skype for long-distance clients. . This program is an investment for the life of your marriage.