Facing the Crisis of Meaning

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We are facing a crisis of meaning. The last few months have been very difficult and unprecedented on many levels—social, financial, and existential. Many of us have been forced to reevaluate our lives and work as we cope with the loss of normal social structures, increased isolation, new health challenges, new work arrangements, and financial uncertainty.

In a larger sense, many people have also been confronted with the additional challenge of reevaluating “who I am” in the advent of job losses through layoffs or small businesses folding. Coming to grips with the mistaken perception that “I am what I do” and realizing that “I am more than my job” just complicated an already tough situation.

But what has happened in the last few months in terms of a crisis of meaning is not new. Alex Pattakos and I have been speaking about the crisis of meaning for many years, including writing about it in our book, Prisoners of Our Thoughts.

Well before the COVID-19 pandemic, many people told us that they feel overwhelmed, lonely, and unfulfilled. In chasing the “good life,” they sacrificed their relationships, their health, and their sanity and at the end of the day, still found themselves with lives and work that bring them little joy and meaning. For a long time, depression has been on the rise and many people simply can’t cope with the pace of change brought on by technological, cultural, and social transformations. When someone doesn’t find meaning, they are left with emptiness or an “existential vacuum,” often filled with self-destructive behaviors.

More people than ever before, in spite of obvious advances in our way and quality of life, appear to be experiencing this existential angst, especially against the backdrop of the pandemic. In our meaning work, people have told us they feel empty because they have lost connections with others due to the transitory nature of life—moving across the country; no longer belonging to or feeling connected to neighborhoods, organizations, social groups, religious groups, or political causes; feeling disconnected from society and fearing that the country is on the wrong track; worrying that civil unrest, including escalating crime, will further disrupt their lives and they will have no one to turn to for help.

People have told us that they feel empty because they lack purpose in their day, not having an inspiring reason to get up in the morning. They worry about being left behind in the job market as more organizations lay off workers or cut hours and benefits. They worry about the instability of constantly chasing contract or part-time jobs. They feel like they are hamsters on the treadmill of life, running faster and faster and still getting nowhere. Older people have told us they wonder if they should have done something more or something different with their life. Did they settle for something less than they really wanted for their life?

Many people are sensing this emptiness, this existential vacuum, but are not sure what to do about it. Some turn to drugs and other forms of avoidance, some resort to aggressive behaviors, including violence or criminal acts, some put on a happy face to mask the issues, others simply withdraw and postpone living a full life. Although not incarcerated by real barbed wire and steel bars, many people feel like they are “prisoners” in their own lives.

The good news is that no one needs to be stuck in their existential prison; no one needs to experience permanently a crisis of meaning. There are keys to escape one’s mental prison cell. And more importantly, these keys are within reach for they are within! Here are three examples of keys that can help to set you free:

1. Choose a positive attitude no matter what is happening around you.

No matter what is happening in the news, at your work, or in your personal life, there is always something positive to focus on. As many great thinkers have advised, you might not be able to choose the situation but you always have the ultimate freedom to choose your attitude toward the situation. Remember, if you continue to see a situation as negative and see yourself as a victim of circumstances, nothing will improve.

2. Choose to interpret situations on the positive side.

We see what we want to see. Perception does not always mirror reality; oftentimes, however, it becomes our “reality.” When we believe that there isn’t enough of this or that in our lives, or when we focus on the fear of losing something, we are effectively living our lives in a world of scarcity. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have in your life, stop complaining and start being grateful for the positive in your life. Try the 10 Positives Things Exercise¹ just before you go to sleep, focus on and list the 10 Positive Things that happened to you today.

3. Have hope—believe in a positive future.

Know that no situation is permanent. Know that all news doesn’t have to be negative and that there is hope for the future. Every day represents a new opportunity to take a fresh attitude toward a particular person, project, situation, or just life in general. Practice visualizing a future where you achieve your goals, and where you see good things happening in the world. In short, be a true optimist.

There is an upside to the crisis of meaning as well as to the COVID pandemic. There is hope for those people encouraged to take meaningful action. By not being "prisoners of our thoughts," we can rise above, and ultimately, improve our lives during these challenging times.