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Key points
- Whether success is difficult or easy depends on an individual's attitude.
- A person's passion turns obstacles into simply part of the journey.
- An appetite for learning is key to staying the course and ultimately being successful.
"Man is disturbed not by things, but by the views he takes of them." —Epictetus
Recently I was interviewed by Rocky Buckley, a strategic business coach and creator of the Power Persona Project. We discussed an aspect of success that I wish I could give to everyone: the concept of a positive temperament or mental state. So I decided to share the conversation in this column.
Rocky: Is success simpler or more complex than people think?
Rob: It's simple if you enjoy what you are doing, and then no problem seems too big, complex, or insurmountable.
Rocky: How does enjoyment connect to simplicity? Not quite getting that.
Rob: It's my opinion that if you love what you're doing, you don't notice any complexity.
Resistance creates conflict, which creates complexity.
Rocky: OK, so it's more about perception and flow than anything else?
Rob: Yes, state of consciousness is everything; it is self-efficacy combined with a positive mental attitude. You know how you feel when you're on a roll—in the zone—when you can't do anything wrong? You are creating no resistance; resistance creates conflict, which creates complexity.
Have you ever been in an extreme hurry, and you're running out of time, and suddenly, with things you've done flawlessly for years, you start making mistakes, which puts you further behind, frustration starts to build, and the errors and irritation begin to snowball? That's the moment you need to pause, take a deep breath, regroup, and then go back to your tasks. Sure, there are businesses that have many moving parts—hence complex—but they don't all have to be perfect at once.
I always encourage people who have a business idea to get started on it, even if they don't know everything yet. You will learn as you go along. And yeah, sometimes it's painful to watch as they stumble along, but if they have heart and enthusiasm, you cheer them on anyway. If you wait until you have all your ducks in a row, you may never get started.
Resistance makes the journey difficult.
Rocky: Right, I guess the question is, how simple or complex is it to get into the frame of mind, state of being, that you are describing? It seems as if you are describing what it feels like after you've figured it out.
Rob: On the contrary, I'm talking about how it feels when you begin. If you are passionate about achieving something, all the obstacles are just part of the journey. And you want the obstacles; you enjoy overcoming them.
As an example, some mountain biking courses have all sorts of physical obstacles: log piles, rock piles, narrow bridges, dirt humps, and lots of tree roots. I've even seen a see-saw. If you start mountain biking and enjoy trail riding, eventually you will want to work on your technical skills, and you start to tackle riding over the obstacles.
Of course, you can go around them until you are ready. Developing the skill to ride over obstacles is part of the journey, part of the joy of mountain biking. The success of getting there, building the know-how, is the end of the journey. If you aren't enjoying a pursuit, you aren't going to stay with it, and if you do stay with it, the journey is going to be difficult and seem much more complex—because of your mental resistance to it—than it would be to someone who desires and enjoys it.
Passion creates the appetite to learn.
Rocky: That makes a lot of sense to me, and I can see how simplicity could be derived from this combination of factors.
Rob: One last note, I’ve taken on many pursuits not because I was interested in them, but because it pleased someone else. These never worked out well for me, seemed overly complex, and typically ended up in failure. I’ve even had family members work to block me or dissuade me from pursuing things that I loved—especially when it came to being a professional writer.
I don’t recall that happening when I decided to become a professional speaker. I was much older, more mature, and had achieved success as a writer, so I believed in myself enough that I could make it as a paid speaker. It was a journey that had been brewing under the surface of my consciousness for years, and I recall the moment it crystallized: I saw Patty Kitching deliver the keynote speech to the closing ceremony of a Hugh O’Brian Youth Foundation leadership retreat. She was funny, entertaining, and informative, and I couldn’t get over how much fun she was clearly having in giving that speech. When she finished, I turned to my wife and said, “I can do that. I want to do that!”
That was the beginning of my conscious journey. I wouldn’t make my first professional speech until six years later—I had a lot of learning to do, and I needed to discover a market—all of which came together in time. I didn’t see it as complex, although it may have been. I was hungry for the how-to knowledge and pursued it actively and enthusiastically, and 29 years later, the journey continues. When your desire is strong enough, the universe lines everything up for you and keeps it simple.
Rocky: Well said, great story—inspiring!
Rob: Thanks, Rocky!
