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As the weather dips and the days shorten, we long even more for the promised joy of the holiday season, and the sense of community that abounds this time of year. Despite some decidedly positive news on the vaccine front, the troubled year that is 2020 will continue to keep people apart over the holidays.
Luckily, what we have learned over the course of this year is that we can continue to connect with loved ones via virtual communication, and perhaps even more importantly, many of us have realized that—to paraphrase a beloved fandom friend from Hogwarts–our loved ones never really leave us. In fact, some of our most cherished relationships have been right beside us this whole time in the form of fandom attachments. And they are here to support you now.
Deciding which fandom attachments you wish to call upon depends heavily on your mood and what you need. If you're grieving the loss of what the holidays once were, you might decide that you want a comforting old friend, like Samwise Gamgee of the Lord of the Rings trilogy to offer you a pep talk. You can achieve that by settling in with a whole box of tissues and embarking on a 12-hour marathon right from your couch. You might also find a similar feeling via a book or video game.
Sometimes when we're grieving, we just need to let ourselves feel sadness while being surrounded by our fellowship—those with whom we have a profound bond. These could be considered the satiating meals of fandom attachment. Those that fill us up and leave us with a great sense of meaning in our hearts and heaviness in our eyelids. The cozy feeling of being wrapped in a weighted blanket surrounded by loved ones.
Of course, when grieving we also need to laugh and be playful. The holidays are often a time for parties and light conversation, of laughing and catching up. If you're craving this feeling, then the A Christmas Prince trilogy, or any of the Netflix holiday canon, can meet that fandom attachment need. Characters like Amber, the blogger turned princess, and the stoic prince turned king Richard, are just fleshed out enough to be friends you see yearly at a party and wish well, but don't require any emotional labor at all. These friends flit in and out of your holiday spreading joy (and a little gossip).
If watching movies isn't resonant for you, you can also find these fandom attachments in books, board games, or YouTube videos. If you're not sure what might resonate, just try a few different ones. These fandom attachments are akin to the holiday cookies that are beautiful to look at and sweet to taste. It's easy to eat too many of them and feel overfull, but if you have just a few, you'll feel a sigh of contentment.
We invite you to pause and consider your feelings and which fandom attachments would feel the most supportive for you. Be mindful that this will change day to day and even moment to moment. Give yourself permission to pause your Watchmen marathon to play a game of Parcheesi, or vice versa. The holiday season has never happened quite like this before, you so get to make the rules and invite the guests.
References
Garski, L.A., & Mastin, J. (2021). Starship Therapise: Using Therapeutic Fanfiction to Rewrite Your Life.Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books.
Garski, L.A., & Mastin, J. (2019). Beyond Canon: Therapeutic Fanfiction and the Queer Hero’s Journey. In L. Rubin (Ed.), Using superheroes and villains in counseling and play therapy: A Guide for Mental Health Professionals. New York, NY: Routledge.
