What Are Problems?

A problem is defined as an unwelcome or harmful situation that is to be dealt with or overcome. [1] From a cognitive neuroscience perspective, a situation is not a problem unless one thinks he or she is unable to deal with it or lacks the skill to do so. On the other hand, from a cognitive behavioral therapy perspective, one’s perception about a situation and not the situation itself determines the feelings and behaviors that follow. [2] And in logotherapy, it is clearly understood that it is the moment we assign a different meaning to a situation, the situation changes. [3]

What is a Problem?

When is a situation considered to be a problem? Why are there so many variants when it comes to a problem? And what does this all mean?

From the start, whenever there are so many variables about something, it is a clear indication that it is not rooted in reality-based thinking. Yet we all talk about problems. Many people see problems as the ultimate cause of suffering. [4] Given that everything related to suffering is framed as a problem, understanding problems from reality-based thinking is an essential milestone for all of us, as we make the shift from illusion-based thinking to reality-based thinking.

For us to do so, let’s first look at a model used in science and academia on the proper way to solve a problem. Once done, it will be apparent why it is so important to understand “problems” as they are and for what they are. It will also become apparent why our relationship with “problems” may itself be the problem, and how we can change that.

When using the problem-solving process model, the following are the first five steps:

1. Identifying the problem
2. Defining the problem
3. Agreeing on the problem
4. Identifying the cause of the problem
5. Identifying the root cause of the problem

Based on the first step, it is clear that we cannot solve a problem that we have failed to identify. Clarity is also essential, according to the second step; when analyzed further, we start to see the variability of what we call a "problem." In other words, what I might define as a problem may be perceived differently by someone else and not as a problem. This is also related to the third step, where it may be difficult for everyone to agree on the problem given how perceptions, coping skills, belief systems, attitudes, or values vary from person to person.

Before moving forward, here are some examples:

1. Someone who is not married may see their singlehood as a terrible problem, while another single person may see it as a great strength—she may, for example, cherish the opportunity to travel whenever, with whomever, and wherever, without having to wait for someone else.
2. Imagine that someone does not have any children, despite several attempts. He makes this the biggest problem in his life, to the point where he identifies not having children as his biggest failure. He then sees himself as the biggest failure, regardless of what other types of accomplishments he may have had. On the other hand, a different person may again make the "failure" of not having children a symbol of freedom, a symbol of dedication to all children in the world, or even a symbol of his ability to better dedicate his time to his career.
3. Someone may start panicking due to not having enough money in their bank account to pay the rent that is due in five days. This person automatically makes this a problem—even though the rent is not due today, but in five days. Someone else under the same circumstances may make this an opportunity to make use of her resourcefulness. This may be an opportunity to think of strategies—using some savings this time, making more sales in her business this week, working some overtime, or borrowing some money as an opportunity to practice letting go of an unhealthy and illusory independence. This might even be an opportunity to practice letting go of shame or embarrassment by going to talk to the landlord and explaining that the rent may be delayed and that she is going to make sure that it is on time going forward. In this vein, this may be that golden opportunity to finally look at her finances and decide what current practices require adjustment to ensure that things like rent, utilities, and other bills get prioritized. In any case, that person is looking at growth, and embracing the opportunity to be taught.

These three examples show that what we call a problem is simply a variable—how it changes from one person to the next; how it changes from one moment to the next for the same person; and therefore, how it cannot be real. For what is real cannot change, while what is unreal cannot exist. In other words, in our view, problems cannot or do not exist. All we have are situations—and our perception of them determines the feelings and behaviors that follow.