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Although many children love Halloween and think it is one of the most exciting holidays of the year (hello, candy coma, getting to wear a fun costume, and staying up late!), it can be a challenge for some children with ASD.
There are a few reasons why Halloween can be difficult for kiddos on the spectrum. These include: sensory sensitivities (tons of loud and unexpected noises, bright lights, etc.), changes in routines (the entire holiday is a break from routine and therefore might be anxiety-provoking), expectations that they greet strangers (some children on the spectrum are uncomfortable with this), and issues with wearing a potentially uncomfortable costume (many children’s costumes have itchy synthetic fabrics).
Given all of this, what can you (as a parent, caregiver, or sibling) do to make the holiday more enjoyable and less stressful? I provide five suggestions below.
Note: Throughout this post, I use the pronoun “she/her/hers."
1. Make a schedule!
Children with ASD often enjoy routines and are more comfortable when the events of a given day/activity are laid out clearly ahead of time. Since Halloween is a huge break in your child’s normal routine, it might be anxiety-provoking.
Make sure to talk about your Halloween plan and consider making a “visual schedule” so that she can see and understand how the day/evening will work. For example, you could write out your ‘normal’ daily routine (e.g. get up, brush teeth, have breakfast, play with Legos, take a nap, etc.), and then add Halloween-specific items (e.g. put on costume, hand out candy/go trick-or-treating, come home, go to bed).
2. Don’t go overboard with costumes.
Keep potential costumes comfortable and easy. Make sure that you encourage your child to try on his or her costume before Halloween to get used to how it feels. If your child hates the costume, do not try to make her wear it. Allow her to make her own choices about what to wear. Maybe think outside of the “costume” box and buy a pair of themed pajamas. Bonus: They work as both a costume and PJs, and are usually comfy and cozy.
3. Get creative about trick-or-treating.
If your child has never been exposed to the idea of “trick-or-treat," try to practice at home before the holiday. Your child can dress up, go outside with a parent or sibling, ring your home doorbell, and practice the entire process from start to finish. This will help you figure out whether she seems to enjoy the process or if it is too overwhelming.
If she appears to enjoy the process, practice a few times before going out on Halloween afternoon/evening. If she is uncomfortable or dislikes it, do not force her to engage in the activity. Instead, consider sitting outside for a while and having her help hand out candy to trick-or-treaters. That way she can participate in the process if she would like to but without the stress of going up to stranger’s doors.
4. Make sure to have comfort items on hand.
If you and your child go trick-or-treating, bring headphones (if she is sensitive to noise), or a comfort item (e.g. a favorite toy, blanket, etc.) in case things become overwhelming. The presence of a comfort item may help your child feel a sense of normalcy amongst the unusual atmosphere, and headphones could allow your child to continue participating in the holiday even if things become too loud.
5. Let go of expectations and "should’s’" and remember it is about fun!
It is important to remember that holidays are supposed to be fun, not stressful. No parts of Halloween are required. If your child does not want to wear a costume, trick-or-treat, or help pass out candy, no problem! It is still possible to have fun without doing any of those things. Your child might like watching as you carve a pumpkin, or might enjoy feeling the squishy, slimy pumpkin “guts." She might like wearing “costume” PJs and watching movies or reading a Halloween-themed book. Maybe she will be more excited about “trick-or-treating” if you only go to the houses of friends and family.
Whatever parts of Halloween she enjoys, focus on doing those things and try not to worry about what it feels like she “should” like or “should” do. All children are different, and as long as you, your child, and your family are happy, that’s the most important thing.
Happy Halloween, everyone!
