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I am tired of hearing about the need for work-life balance. To my way of thinking, life is never in “balance.” Sometimes work needs to take top priority, sometimes family does, and sometimes we need to take the top spot for ourselves on the importance list.
Indeed, work-life balance is simply impractical. In fact, making it the goal can lead to personal disappointments on many levels, including:
- The two-edged swords of stress and guilt. We feel guilt when we give work greater priority than we give our families; we feel stress when we spend time with family and friends instead of finishing the work we know waits for us at the office. Either way, we lose.
- Potential career limitations. In certain competitive professions, prioritizing personal life over work may result in missed opportunities to get ahead in one’s career. And, of course, a lack of career advancement may add additional pressure at home as income fails to keep up with the financial demands of modern life.
- Strained personal relationships. Similarly, family members and friends may feel neglected when we put an emphasis on work. This can lead to disharmony and conflict with the ones we care about, making us unhappy as a result.
- Being judged for how you achieve satisfaction. Not everyone desires or values an equal distribution of time and energy between work and personal life. Some individuals find fulfillment and satisfaction in dedicating a significant portion of their time to work, while others may prioritize personal pursuits or relationships. Judging someone for prioritizing work is as hurtful as judging someone for a lack of professional ambition.
For these reasons, among others, I offer that work-life balance is the wrong goal, and that there must be a better way to think about the connection between our lives and livelihood.
Enter Work-Life Integration
Establishing work and life integration involves finding ways to harmonize and blend your work responsibilities with your personal life in a way that supports your overall well-being and satisfaction.
When we recognize that work and the rest of our lives can be integrated, there are no boundaries to set or defend: Work and the rest of life is simply what we do. Are there tradeoffs to be made from time to time? Of course. But, a holistic approach enables us to shift our mindset and adjust expectations so we can do everything in our lives more fully and with greater satisfaction.
Here are some steps you can take to promote work and life integration:
Know What’s Important. Consider your long-term goals, aspirations, and the things that bring you joy and fulfillment. This self-reflection will help you determine what integration means to you and guide your priority-setting process.
Because I have routinely shifted priorities throughout each week for so long, I don’t even recognize when I’m doing it. It has become just how I live. As such, there’s no guilt or stress when I have to place an emphasis on work or home or play.
Set Schedules for Work and Attending to Personal Matters. Determine specific times or days when you are fully dedicated to work and others when you focus solely on personal matters. Communicate your schedule so loved ones and colleagues understand when they can expect your undivided attention.
For example, I’ve developed effective time management strategies to optimize my productivity and ensure I make the most of my working hours. I use tools such as to-do lists, calendars, and productivity apps to stay organized and focused — and, I’ve integrated work and my personal life into these tools.
Seek Flexibility In All That You Do. Embrace flexibility in your work arrangements whenever possible. Explore options such as remote work, flexible hours, or compressed workweeks that allow you to balance your professional and personal commitments effectively. Discuss these possibilities with your employer to find mutually beneficial solutions.
For instance, my corporate coaching practice is entirely remote, giving me the flexibility I need to attend to other activities between scheduled coaching sessions.
Delegate and Outsource Everything You Can. Learn to delegate tasks at work and enlist the help of others when necessary. Delegation not only relieves your workload but also allows you to focus on high-priority tasks and responsibilities. Similarly, consider outsourcing personal tasks or seeking support from family members, friends, or professional services to reduce your personal responsibilities.
I don’t even own a lawn mower, for example! Lawn care was outsourced long ago. Similarly, grocery shopping apps have enabled my family to outsource that chore, too. Look for activities and ways to outsource and take back your valuable time.
Take Care to Take Care. Make self-care a priority by engaging in activities that promote your physical, mental, and emotional well-being. This can include regular exercise, mindfulness practices, hobbies, spending quality time with loved ones, and taking breaks throughout the day to recharge and rejuvenate.
To illustrate, these activities are scheduled into my life calendar right next to family and work obligations. In fact, I’m going to work-out right after my 2 P.M. meeting today!
Be Present and Mindful. Practice being fully present in the moment, whether you are at work or engaging in personal activities. Mindfulness helps you focus on the task at hand, increases your enjoyment, and improves your overall performance and well-being.
I’ve found that re-scripting my self-talk is central to my being present in all that I do. While still a work in progress, I recognize that reminding myself to “stay in the moment” enables me to be at my best — and, that’s critical to effective work-life integration.
Remember, work and life integration is a personal journey, and the steps may vary for each individual. It requires ongoing effort, self-awareness, and a willingness to make adjustments that support your overall happiness and fulfillment in both work and the rest of your life.
