8 Tips for Dealing with a Pet with Behavioral Issues

If your pet has a behavior issue, it can be hard to know what to do. Here are some tips to help you find the right kind of help and resolve the problem.

Getting advice

1. Make sure you’re getting advice from the right places.

This is a biggie because unfortunately there is a lot of incorrect and outdated advice out there. There can even be inaccurate information in top-selling dog training books (Browne et al 2017). One thing to do is to make sure you only take advice from people who use reward-based methods because aversive methods have risks for your pet’s welfare (for more on this, see my previous post, "Why Dogs with Behavior Problems Deserve Compassion).

For the more serious behavior issues, getting help might mean seeing a veterinary behaviorist. One study found that, when people were considering rehoming or euthanizing their pet, fewer than 10 percent did so after seeing a veterinary behaviorist (Siracusa et al 2017).

Source: Simon Robben/Pexels

2. Take a trip to the vet in case of medical issues.

Any time there is a sudden change in your pet’s behavior it’s important to see your vet. A common example for both cats and dogs is if your house-trained pet starts to have accidents in the house. It’s important to find out if there’s a medical cause, such as an infection. Another example is pain, because pain can also be behind some behavior issues such as not wanting to be petted. If you’ve noticed signs that might indicate pain — such as your cat no longer wanting to jump up high, your dog not wanting to jump on the sofa like they used to, or your pet being reluctant to go up and down stairs — mention it to your vet while you're there.

Keep learning about your pet

3. See difficulties as training opportunities.

Pets aren’t robots, so it’s inevitable that any training or behavior plan will progress with ups and downs, and it’s normal to have training setbacks from time to time. The key thing is to have a good plan and stick to it. For a fearful dog or cat, this will involve protecting them from whatever it is they are afraid of while you work on the training. With reactive dogs, it’s easy to make a mistake (e.g. someone comes too close or lets their dog run up to you). Seeing setbacks like this as a training opportunity is one of the strategies that can help people stick to the plan (Williams and Blackwell 2019).

4. Understand that strong feelings are a normal reaction to the situation.

There are a lot of negative emotions that can come with having a pet with a behavior issue. People report feeling frustrated, stressed, nervous, angry, sad, and like they’ve let their pet down (Williams and Blackwell 2019; Buller and Ballantyne 2020). The good news? People also express a lot of love for their pet, despite having issues.

5. Keep learning.

These days we keep learning more and more about dogs and cats. So even if you grew up with pets, or you last got a pet 15 years ago, what we know has changed in that time. If your pet has behavior issues, it’s especially important to get up to date on current knowledge about animal behavior and how pets learn.

Advocate for your pet and keep track

6. Celebrate the small successes.

Keep track of changes so you can look back and see progress. When you’re busy coping with a behavior issue, it can be hard to see the progress that is happening right under your nose. If you keep track (e.g. in a diary), then you can look back and see how far you’ve come. And every step towards resolving the issue is worthy of celebration. Maybe your dog used to be reactive when 100 meters from another dog, but now they can be 75 meters away and they’re still happy, or perhaps your two cats are getting on better. If you learn to celebrate the small successes, it helps you work towards the bigger ones.

7. Learn how to deal with unwanted advice.

Unfortunately, a lot of people feel like they want to give “advice” on other people’s pets. A good response can range from saying what you need (e.g. “Put your dog on a leash”), getting out of the area, telling people “Thank you” and turning away to end the conversation, or saying, “We don’t do things like that anymore.” Of course, you can try ignoring the person or, if you have to talk to them, completely change the subject. Just because someone erroneously claims your dog is trying to be the “alpha” doesn’t mean you can’t reply with “Did you see X on TV last night?” or “Isn’t it hot today?”

What if it’s a family member who you need to get on your side because they are partly responsible for caring for your pet? Try the phrase “Are you willing..?” which can commonly get a positive response (Stokoe 2018). For example, “Are you willing to walk the dog early in the morning while it’s quiet?” or "Would you be willing to take five minutes to play with the cat with the wand toy before you feed her?”

8. Don’t make sudden decisions (e.g. about euthanasia or rehoming).

In the worst moments, sometimes it can feel like there are no choices. But often there are, and maybe once you’ve had time to reflect, things won’t seem quite so bad. If something happens, like your pet bites someone, don’t make decisions in the heat of the moment. Do what’s necessary to keep everyone safe (e.g. if needed, shut your pet in another room while things calm down), but take your time before making any big decisions.

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Consider going back to point #1, getting help. The good news is that the right help can make a big difference.