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Key points
- There is growing recognition of the prevalence of abuse against men, including sons who have grown up with abusive mothers.
- In the context of maternal abuse, emotional abuse is often the most prevalent type of abuse.
- Despite the challenges they face, sons of abusive mothers can develop coping mechanisms to help them manage the impact of abuse.
Abuse is a pervasive problem in society that affects individuals of all genders, ages, and backgrounds. While the majority of research on abuse has focused on women as victims, there is growing recognition of the prevalence of abuse against men, including sons who have grown up with abusive mothers. Sons of abusive mothers face unique challenges that can have lasting impacts on their emotional and psychological well-being.
Abuse can take many forms, including physical, emotional, sexual, and financial. In the context of maternal abuse, emotional abuse is often the most prevalent type. Emotional abuse can include verbal attacks, criticism, rejection, neglect, and gaslighting. Physical abuse, while less common, can also occur, including hitting, kicking, and other forms of violence. Sexual abuse can also occur, including inappropriate touching, unwanted sexual advances, and rape. Financial abuse, such as withholding money or controlling access to financial resources, can also be a form of abuse.
The impact of maternal abuse on sons can be profound and long-lasting. Sons who have grown up with abusive mothers may experience a range of emotional and psychological effects, including low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, anger, and difficulty forming healthy relationships. They may also struggle with trust issues and have difficulty setting boundaries. Sons of abusive mothers may also be at increased risk for substance abuse and other forms of self-destructive behavior.
Despite the challenges they face, sons of abusive mothers can develop coping mechanisms to help them manage the impact of abuse. One common coping mechanism is dissociation, or mentally checking out during periods of abuse. While dissociation can be helpful in the moment, it can also lead to difficulties with emotional regulation later in life. Other coping mechanisms may include seeking support from friends or family members, finding a therapist or counselor, and practicing self-care activities such as exercise, meditation, or creative pursuits.
There are several resources available to support sons of abusive mothers. These include therapy and counseling services, support groups, and online forums. Some organizations, such as the 988 Crisis LifeLine, provide resources for male survivors of abuse. It is important for sons of abusive mothers to seek out support and resources that are tailored to their unique experiences.
Sons of abusive mothers face significant challenges as a result of their experiences with abuse. While there is growing recognition of the prevalence of maternal abuse and its impact on sons, there is still a need for more research and support for this population.
References
1. Adams, M., & Cox, T. (2019). Understanding the Long-Term Effects of Childhood Emotional Abuse on Men. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 36(11-12), 5317-5345. doi: 10.1177/0886260518765663
2. Allen, C. T. (2018). Mother-Son Relationship Quality, Emotional Dysregulation, and Perceived Stress: Effects on Emerging Adult Men’s Physical Health. Journal of Family Violence, 33(3), 225-236. doi: 10.1007/s10896-017-9945-7
3. Dixon, L., & Graham-Kevan, N. (2011). Understanding the Nature and Experience of Domestic Violence by Male Victims. Journal of Family Violence, 26(8), 623-630. doi: 10.1007/s10896-011-9393-3
4. Hamel, J., & Nicholls, T. (2007). Male Victims of Domestic Violence: A Substantive and Methodological Research Review. Journal of Family Violence, 22(4), 273-285. doi: 10.1007/s10896-007-9083-3
5. Kelly, J. B., & Johnson, M. P. (2008). Differentiation Among Types of Intimate Partner Violence: Research Update and Implications for Interventions. Family Court Review, 46(3), 476-499. doi: 10.1111/j.1744-1617.2008.00215.x
6. Kuijpers, K. F., van der Knaap, L. M., & Lodewijks, H. P. B. (2020). Gender Differences in Adverse Childhood Experiences and Their Relationship with Later Life Mental Health and Substance Use: An Exploratory Study Among Older Adults in the Netherlands. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 36(5-6), 2605-2623. doi: 10.1177/0886260518769861
7. Miller, S. A., & DiPietro, J. A. (2019). Abuse in Childhood and Adulthood: The Association with Intimate Partner Violence Perpetration and Victimization. Journal of Interpersonal Violence, 36(9-10), 4494-4514. doi: 10.1177/0886260518769862
8. National Domestic Violence Hotline. (2021). Help for Male Survivors of Domestic Violence. Retrieved from https://www.thehotline.org/help/male-survivors/
