How Our Emotions Dictate the Way We View Time

Over the years the meaning of time has changed for most people. Just like a summer’s day that seems to extend into eternity at the age of six or seven, an entire year can retreat in the blink of an eye for a person who has graced this earth for multiple decades. According to neuroscience, it has to do with the brain’s perception of time and experience itself. In addition, a person’s emotional state dictates how we view the passage of time. According to one study, researchers discovered that people perceive time as passing more quickly when their lives are filled with time pressure, boredom, and routine. Additionally, more future-oriented individuals, as opposed to living in the moment, also experience time as moving faster.[1]

In whichever way we see time, what is true for every living being is that we have a limited number of units in our bank account of time. For some, their units last into their 90s while for others, they run out of time in their 20s. In other words, those who are born will also die. The time spanning between a person’s birth and death date makes up their bank account of time. Being confronted by death, whether our own or someone else's, can raise a lot of fear. And in some cases, gratitude too.

For author Kate Banks she took her last withdrawal in February 2024. Following a stage 4 neuroendocrine cancer diagnosis in 2022, she opted for a medically assisted death in Basel, Switzerland. Before she transitioned, she penned the most exquisite compilation of poetry about the wonder of youth, fear, and grief. An award-winning children’s book author whose biography spans from Maine to Rome to the South of France, Banks captures the meaning of life – her life – in five sections with a dozen or more poems in each. Her beautifully written words strike a chord at the heart of the matter: our lives are finite even if that summer’s day many years ago felt that they aren’t.

The most chilling tribute to her life well-lived, despite trauma, suffering, and the early loss of her father due to murder, is the poem “In the Ether,” after which her book is named.[2] She bids her body farewell:

[1] Banks, K. (2024). Into the ether. Regal House Publishing.

Then Body is cast off gently,

an item of well-worn clothing, soiled and scarred,

and Soul leaves home, closing the door.

At last Body is free to begin its own exodus,

and Soul left to lift ist wings and fly into the ether,

homeward bound.

It’s good to be home where Soul

meets Self

And finally is told, "You did well."

For anyone who is struggling with the loss of a loved one, Banks offers words of comfort and beauty. Most of us do not know when our bank account will be empty. What counts most of all, she advises us, is what we do with what we have left.