Find Magic During the Holidays and the Other Days

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Magic has become an all-purpose word. We use it to describe anything we find fascinating: fireflies, electricity, music that gives us goosebumps, love. But we also use the word to describe connections to other people, moving celebrations like weddings, and the thrill of a novel experience.

Children find it particularly easy to believe in magic, but as we learn more about how the world works, fewer things seem magical. That doesn’t stop us from trying to replicate magical feelings. Whether we are traveling to the farthest reaches of the world, diving under the sea, or studying cells under a microscope, humans are driven to seek novelty and excitement in the unusual. This quest isn’t new. Throughout history, humans have tried to understand how the environment around us works, and the meaning of our lives. Across continents, cultures, and eras, people have come up with stories often based on magic to try to make sense of the inexplicable, and of our own mortality.

Life in the 21^st century has altered our sense of what is magic. Transmitting information across airwaves, sending humans into space, and having access to computers that perform calculations and store information at the press of a key would have seemed like magic to our ancestors. But the information overload and lifestyle changes that accompany these technological advances can make it harder to hang on to a sense of wonder.

We take instantaneous communication for granted, trust a disembodied voice from our GPS to help us find our way in unfamiliar cities, and are unfazed by Google searches that yield thousands of hits on any topic. In fact, we habituate so quickly to these changes that we find it hard to remember what life was like before we had cell phones and 24-hour news channels. The ever-increasing speed of modern life may account for the emphasis we place milestone events, such as birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays. When events take on multiple meanings, we often feel compelled to make them as elaborate and magical as we can.

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There is one holiday that looms particularly large in the magic firmament, Christmas. Based on the story of a long-ago virgin birth, stars, angels, and the kindness of strangers, the story still resonates for millions of people. Traditions like nativity scenes, candlelit churches, and carols help us feel connected to those who came before us. The fact that this is a holiday about a birth has become linked to the darkness of winter. The symbolism of evergreen trees and the elusive chance of fresh snow fosters the hope that something magical will happen.

While Christmas is celebrated in countries around the world, the cultural details differ. Gift-giving practices, food choices, and even the date vary. But one consistent aspect of Christmas is the expectation that a magical character will use the holiday to reward or punish children for their behavior throughout the year. Whether they expect a jolly man dressed in red who drives a team of flying reindeer, a witch, or other mythical figures, children go to sleep hoping they will wake up to physical proof that this magical person was in their house and brought them a gift.

As we get older, the logistical limitations of the story become more apparent, but we rarely forget the feeling of wonder. Perhaps that’s why so many of us find Christmas to be a complicated holiday filled with old memories, future expectations, and the hope that if we just decorate the house well enough, buy the right gifts or have the best party we will recreate that magic. The problem is that we are looking for this magic in the wrong place.

It turns out that magic is a feeling, not a thing, and it depends on a sense of wonder, not expectation. So, if you find yourself approaching this Christmas season with trepidation, it might be worth searching for a way to rekindle that wonder in yourself and others. Instead of complaining about how the teenagers around you dress or behave, find something genuine to compliment them on. Rather than cutting off someone who is telling a story you have already heard, listen, and note something new or interesting. Older people, in particular, want to know that the things they have done in their lives won’t be forgotten. If you are facing a lonely holiday, take the initiative to invite other people over to watch movies, or share food that reminds them of their culture or childhood. Sometimes changing tired traditions can add a bit of magic to the experience.

If you value tradition, put on some of your favorite music and spend time reading a Christmas story or appreciating your Christmas tree. Even a Charlie Brown tree, with just a couple of lights, can look magical if you let it. As children grow older and lose their belief in Santa, include them in making Christmas magical for younger siblings or less fortunate families. Create new traditions around favored foods, music, or treasured activities. Exchange dollar tree stocking gifts, have an ornament decorating party, or a holiday scavenger hunt. Doing things together with people you care about brings its own form of connection and wonder.

There is nothing wrong with devoting thought and energy into making a holiday special. But the truth is that the everyday world is filled with magic, too. It isn’t all as dramatic as finding the present you asked for under the tree, but approaching our daily lives with wonder can be rewarding in itself. Maybe instead of gambling that a single day will be magical, we could focus on recognizing and creating magic in our daily lives. This wouldn’t mean that Christmas couldn’t be special, but it would mean that we would have 364 other days to seek and foster that magical feeling.