Does Self-Loathing Get Better or Worse in Certain Situations?

In my last post, I discussed whether self-loathing had to be "all-or-nothing," representing a thorough self-assessment, or if it could be selective, allowing people to recognize good and bad aspects of themselves, even if overall they view themselves negatively. To do this, I explored a connection between the structure of self-loathing and the "unity of the virtues" maintained by many virtue theorists, in which having one virtue implies that a person has them all. In this post, I want to look at another analogy between self-loathing and virtue ethics, based on the situationist critique of virtue theory.

The situationist critique maintains that behavior based on a virtue-a general character trait or disposition--is not stable across different situations. For instance, a person may be regarded as generally honest, or kind, or generous, because he or she displays these character traits often. But psychologists have shown that such behaviors can be changed literally on a dime: one such experiment found that people who found a dime in a payphone* were much more likely to perform an act of generosity immediately afterwards.

This example, and many others, can be found in Lack of Character, a book by philosopher John Doris, one of the leading voices in the situationist critique of virtue ethics. The general claim of the situationists is that saying a person embodies a virtue or character trait such as honesty does not predict that person's behavior, which is more influenced by the particulars of the given situation. If generosity can be inspired by something as minor as finding a dime in a payphone, then how deeply ingrained can a disposition towards generosity be?

Of course, virtue theorists do not take this lying down, taking issue with both the situationists' understanding of virtue as well as their interpretation of their experimental findings. In short, virtue theorists argue that no one said that there is a direct link between character traits and behavior, and that while people on the "margin of virtue" may be influenced by finding random dimes, plenty of the test subjects performed the generous acts without finding the dimes. Furthermore, we can never know if those who were generous after finding the dimes would not have done the same had they not found them. In other words, it's difficult to analyze one person's reaction to situational change by sampling across a number of people.

This is all very interesting, and I could say a lot more on this (and perhaps I will in the future), but for current purposes, what does this have to do with self-loathing? Again, this train of thought was inspired by my commenter Jo's earlier comment, quoted in the last post, about the possibility of self-loathing being in some way "situational." Based on her subsequent comments, I suspect she was referring to something like what I discussed in the last post, but the possibility of self-loathing being situationist in the same way that those like Doris think of virtuous behavior started me thinking-and I do think there's something there.

Whereas Jo's comment and my last post focus on a person only loathing specific aspects of him- or herself, let's talk about overall self-loathing that is only triggered in certain situations (as the virtues are in the situationist critique). For instance, take where I am as I'm writing this: a large regional economics conference, giving two presentations on Kantian ethics and economics. When I arrived earlier yesterday morning my hotel room was not ready, so I sat in the lobby for several hours, draining my laptop and phone batteries, and trying to prepare for talks while watching the masses of fellow scholars mill by.

I've rarely felt so uncomfortable and out-of-place in my life. It wasn't simply introversion or dislike of crowds, but something more: "I don't belong here." I watched them in their professional attire, chatting confidently with each about their work and their careers, with an enthusiasm and a verve which I cannot imagine having myself. (And it's not just economists, with whom I share less interests-meetings of philosophers and law professors make me feel the same way.)

But then the situation changed when my first conference session started, and I oddly felt at "home." The self-loathing subsided, and I felt comfortable, even though I didn't know most of the (few) people in the room. My talk started hesitantly and slowly, but before long I was passionate and animated. (Yes, about Kantian ethics and economics.) I was "in the zone," so to speak, and that high lasted for several hours after the session was over-I was beaming, and I could tell people noticed.

Will I feel the same way at my session later today? I don't know; it's a different group of people, different setting, different situation. But that's the point, isn't it? Maybe self-loathing is situational. Just because some people may feel inadequate most of the time does not mean that they cannot feel better about themselves in certain situations, especially ones in which their talents and abilities-the things that they may feel good about, as discussed in the last post-are allowed to shine.

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As I've written before, positive external reinforcement is unlikely to "cure" self-loathing in the long run, but it can be a powerful short-run salve, especially if the person embraces it rather than dismisses it. I would not recommend avoiding uncomfortable situations altogether, for it is in those situations that we are challenged and grow stronger. But it is important also to take refuge in comfortable situations from time to time--to recharge our batteries, if you will, and to enable us to face unpleasant circumstances with less discomfort and anxiety.

Speaking of which, I need to prepare for my talk this afternoon, in hopes of feeling good about it afterwards-I have to stay in the zone through the high-pressure group dinner afterwards!

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* Link provided for the youth. Now get off my lawn!

For a list of my previous Psychology Today posts on self-loathing (and other topics), see here.

You can follow me on Twitter and also at the following blogs: Economics and Ethics, The Comics Professor, and my homepage/blog.