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Human beings are, by nature, imaginative creatures who want to fully experience everything life has to offer. We’re also born to deeply value our connections with the people in our lives. The problem is that we are also naturally limited by the time and space into which we are born. And we’re distracted by the endless array of minutia that populates our daily “to do” lists. We’re born as characters from WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE and end up behind a desk in OFFICE SPACE*.
But whether we’re busy gnashing our terrible teeth or filling out TPS reports, somewhere inside is the urge to know more and to grow more. And that’s often why we go to the movies or get hooked on a new series. We want to feed that imagination and feel the feels.
A MILLION LITTLE THINGS
In this spirit, I want to turn the spotlight on the new ABC show A MILLION LITTLE THINGS. If you asked me what the show is about, I might say: friendship, suicide, coping with the big things, or making sense of what’s important. None of that sounds as great as the show itself is. I, for one, don’t really approach a show with a “take your medicine” kind of vibe in mind. Like little Mikey from the Life cereal commercials, I don’t necessarily get that excited about things because they’re “supposed to be good for you.”
For more on “what it’s about,” here’s a series description of A MILLION LITTLE THINGS:
“Set in Boston, a tight-knit circle of friends is shocked after a member of the group dies from suicide unexpectedly. Each friend realizes that they need to finally start living life as they cope with their loss. The title is a reference to the saying ‘Friendship isn't a big thing – it's a million little things.’" From A_Million_Little_Things
WHAT ARE WE WAITING FOR?
Let's shine the spotlight on, “Each friend realizes that they need to finally start living life as they cope with their loss.” This is where the universal appeal of the show kicks in for me. It’s a show about what friendship is. It’s a show about what it means to really live. AMLT prompts us to ask ourselves "What am I waiting for?" In other words, what should I be doing right now and what's really stopping me?
Psychology research tells us that one of the reasons we are drawn to a show or film is that it evokes the kind of bittersweet feelings that life itself evokes. Also, a story attracts us if we come to feel that it is telling us something that’s important about life. Stories like this jumpstart our imaginations.
In an ensemble cast like this, we connect with everything that it means to be a person…with the moments when we crash and the moments when we soar. The show begins with the suicide of one of the central members of a group of friends. Little by little, each life unfolds and we learn about secrets and lies, and also about loyalty and love. Good writing and good acting allow us to care about each of the friends in this group and about their relationships with each other. We ask ourselves so many of life’s real questions, such as:
-If someone we love betrays us, can we ever forgive them?
-What makes someone a good person or a bad person?
-Can we ever forgive ourselves for not being there for a friend?
-Why would someone want to take his own life?
-What does it really mean to love someone?
-What do you do when you make a terrible mistake?
-In the end, what really matters in life?
This is what the show A MILLION LITTLE THINGS does for us. It’s a place to imagine and to feel.
I started watching AMLT because I follow the actor James Roday, who my kids and I still love to watch in the funny, modern Holmes-and-Watson-esque series PSYCH. I was excited to see that Roday was coming back to the small screen, and this time in a dramatic series, since his character, Shawn Spenser, in PSYCH was pretty much incapable of sustained seriousness.
I have to give James Roday a shout out – he is amazing in the role. In fact, there’s not a bad note in the entire cast. I confess that many times as I watch AMLT, the tears are streaming. As the credits role, I am thinking that I learned something and that I took away some examples of people doing their best to cope with all the messiness that is life.
I’ll also give a shout out to the writers. How does one deal appropriately with the topic of suicide? Over the first season, the writers have rolled out the questions that spin in the minds of Jon’s friends after his loss. Partially through the voice of the character of Maggie, who is a therapist, we are given a nuanced and educated approach to understanding what happened. I am grateful that AMLT did not offer up pat answers or single answers to a very complex question.
A show that’s “about suicide” sounds pretty dismal. A MILLION LITTLE THINGS is not “about suicide,” as much as it’s about life and why it’s worth fighting for.
*Ron Livingston played the boss in OFFICE SPACE and also plays Jon, who commits suicide in A MILLION LITTLE THINGS
FURTHER READING
Men confront emotions in A Million Little Things: Men confront emotions
A Million Little Things is all about friendship: AMLT is all about Friendship
