Narcissistic Rage and Humiliated Fury

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Psychological researchers have found that there are two kinds of narcissists:

1. Grandiose narcissists: Dominant, extraverted, overconfident, exploitative, egotistical, low emotional distress. This is the version of narcissism people tend to be most familiar with.

2. Vulnerable narcissists: Self-centered, introverted, defensive, resentful, high emotional distress. Psychologists call them “hidden” narcissists because they don’t self-promote the way the grandiose types do.

Both types hold high opinions of themselves and believe they deserve special treatment.

Grandiose narcissists enjoy seeking any kind of attention. Their positive self-image is resistant to criticism. They always think they’re amazing no matter what people say.

In contrast, vulnerable narcissists have mixed feelings about seeking attention. They are overly excited at the prospect of positive feedback but excessively sensitive to negative feedback. They have a high opinion of themselves but this high opinion can be thwarted if the external world does not validate it.

Both types of narcissists tend to be exploitative and see themselves as deserving of special treatment.

Compared to grandiose narcissists, vulnerable narcissists are more sensitive to insults, ruminate more about perceived unfairness, and report more anger when they do not receive what they think they deserve. Although vulnerable narcissists require external feedback to maintain their sense of self, they are often dissatisfied with the feedback they receive.

Narcissistic Rage

Narcissists, when they feel their carefully constructed identity is threatened, are prone to lashing out in an attempt to eliminate the source of the threat. Narcissistic rage is the response to a combination of shame and depression.

The Austrian-American psychoanalyst Heinz Kohut wrote, “the narcissistically injured cannot rest until he has blotted out a vaguely experienced offender who dared to oppose him, to disagree with him, or to outshine him.”

Narcissistic injuries result when a narcissist feels that the image they present in public has been threatened. They feel shame when their hidden “true self” has been revealed both to themselves and others.

To conceal the shame (which is often too painful), they react with rage. Some psychologists use the term “humiliated fury.” People who feel shame in response to their flaws being exposed are more likely to lash out.

But what kind of narcissist is most prone to this kind of explosive response?

Rage: Grandiose vs. Vulnerable Narcissists

In a paper titled “Narcissist Rage Revisited,” led by psychology professor Zlatan Krizan at Iowa State University, researchers investigated which kind of narcissist is most prone to experiencing shame, hostility, aggressiveness, and anger.

Researchers gave different scales to participants, who rated how much they agreed with these statements:

Vulnerable narcissism

• “My feelings are easily hurt by the slighting remarks of others.”
• “When I enter a room I become self-conscious and feel the eyes of others are upon me.”
• “I often interpret the remarks of others in a personal way.”

Grandiose narcissism

• “I can usually talk my way out of anything.”
• “Modesty doesn’t become me.”
• “I will usually show off if I get the chance.”

The researchers were interested in which of these two types of narcissism would be most associated with:

• Aggression (e.g., “I have threatened people I know,” and, “I have become so mad that I’ve broken things.”)
• Anger (e.g., “I sometimes feel like a powder keg ready to explode,” and, “I have trouble controlling my temper.”)
• Angry rumination (e.g., “I think about certain events from a long time ago and they still make me angry,” and, “I ponder about the injustices that have been done to me.”)
• Hostility (e.g., “I am sometimes eaten up with jealousy,” and, “I wonder why sometimes I feel so bitter about things.”)
• Shame (e.g., “A friend tells you that you boast a great deal. What is the likelihood that you would stop spending time with that friend?”)
• Mistrust (e.g., “I am wary of others,” and, “I suspect hidden motives in others.”)

What kind of narcissist is more prone to negative emotion and violence?

Results:

• Vulnerable narcissism (r = .56) was a much stronger predictor of aggression than grandiose narcissism (r = .23)
• Vulnerable narcissism (r = .56) was a much stronger predictor of anger than grandiose narcissism (r = .15)
• Vulnerable narcissism (r = .58) was a much stronger predictor of angry rumination than grandiose narcissism (r = -.06; not significant)
• Vulnerable narcissism (r = .58) was a much stronger predictor of hostility than grandiose narcissism (r = .07; not significant)
• Vulnerable narcissism were more likely to experience shameful self-evaluation (r = .29) and grandiose narcissists were less likely (r = - .32)
• Vulnerable narcissism (r = .42) was a strong predictor of mistrust compared to grandiose narcissism (r = -.12; apparently grandiose narcissists are slightly more trusting than average)

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Hidden Dangers?

In short, vulnerable narcissism is a consistent and powerful predictor of aggression, anger, angry rumination, hostility, shame, and mistrust. Vulnerable narcissism appears to be more likely to lead to violence than grandiose narcissism. Additionally, vulnerable narcissism is associated with stronger shame responses, whereas grandiose narcissism predicts less shame.

As the researchers put it, these findings, “consistently reveal narcissistic vulnerability to be a driver of narcissistic rage, an explosive mix of mistrust, anger, and rumination that results in lashing out at those who stand in the way.”

These findings suggest we should be at least as wary of the “hidden” narcissists among us as we are of the grandiose ones.