The Strongest Signal That a Woman Is Flirting

Chances are, most of us have wondered at some time if someone was flirting with us. But sometimes it’s hard to know for sure. Someone could share a warm smile, a kind gesture, or an offhand remark. Or it could just be our wishful thinking. Misunderstandings about flirting can potentially result in awkwardness or even accusations of sexual harassment. So, how can we figure out what other people mean when they smile at us? Is there a unique, identifiable facial expression representing flirting—and if so, what does it convey, and how effective is it?

A new study from the University of Kansas has been published in the Journal of Sex Research examining if flirting involves a particular facial cue effectively used by women to indicate interest in a man.

A total of 482 pictures were taken of nine female posers. The women were either professional actresses or women who, in a preliminary interview, reported having flirted in the past. The pictures consisted of happy and neutral expressions (controls), and flirtatious expressions (experimental) that were made spontaneously by the poser or as instructed by the experimenter. All posers wore a white t-shirt and were photographed against a blue background. Each picture was rated by 117 men, with an average age of 20.

The women were asked either to spontaneously pose with a flirting expression (similar to what they'd use at a bar to get attention from a potential mate) or to follow instructions based on existing anthropological literature on what researchers define as flirting. Researchers used the Facial Action Coding System (FACS) to classify the morphology of highly recognized flirtatious facial expressions. The coding showed that the most effective flirting cues included a head turned to one side and tilted down slightly, a slight smile, and eyes turned forward toward the implied target. After identifying these most recognized expressions of flirting, the researchers used them in experimental studies.

The research team found some women are more effective than others in effectively conveying a flirtatious facial cue, while some men are better at recognizing this cue. Beyond these individual differences, a few expressions were identified by most (if not all) men as flirting. The researchers found internal states—such as being romantically or sexually interested in someone—can be conveyed to others non-verbally through facial expression. In other words, flirting does work.

According to one of the study’s collaborators, Amri Gillath, "Across our six studies, we found most men were able to recognize a certain female facial expression as representing flirting. It has a unique morphology, and it's different from expressions that have similar features—for example, smiling—but aren't identified by men as flirting expression."

Previous research suggests that men have a harder time knowing whether women are flirting or just being friendly—confusion which could be a recipe for disaster. The researchers concluded that their findings could give sometimes-clueless men a more concrete way to decipher the subtle flirting code and figure out if a woman is truly flirting. Not only does this bring clarity to a potentially misread situation, it could help to prevent men from acting on misunderstood cues and then facing accusations of harassment.

"For the first time, not only were we able to isolate and identify the expressions that represent flirting, but we were also able to reveal their function—to activate associations related with relationships and sex," Gillath said.

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