Love and Inclusion: Intersecting Pathways to Fulfillment

In our constant search for psychological fulfillment and growth, few concepts rival the complexity and importance of love. Love is found in our personal relationships, but also shapes our communities and our professional interactions. As a psychologist who studies leadership development, I have learned that while the concept of “love” is often unspoken and not discussable in some contexts—particularly in the corporate and professional spheres—it can be experienced, learned, and explored through the practice of inclusive leadership.

Inclusive leadership is characterized by behaviors like empathy and compassion, safe and collaborative communication, openness to new perspectives, fair and respectful treatment of others, and continuous learning and growth. Love is described similarly with some notable additions including affection and care, selflessness and sacrifice, and unconditional acceptance, as well as some exceptions such as a specific commitment to diversity and equity, and deliberate allyship. Fortunately, both love and inclusion are associated with greater happiness, well-being, and creativity. Between the two, love is the more complex concept while inclusion can be considered a specific expression of love, helping us to better understand what love is and how we can create it. To experience deeper levels of psychological fulfillment in our lives, then, perhaps inclusion and love can learn some important lessons from each other.

First, let’s compare love and inclusion. Both fundamentally shape personal and communal well-being by influencing relationship dynamics. Love, often imbued with affection, care, and selflessness, manifests in personal connections and interpersonal dynamics, strengthening bonds of understanding and empathy. As bell hooks famously shared, “Love is an act of will, both an intention and an action.” Similarly, inclusion, as embodied in inclusive leadership, requires active empathy, collaboration, and respect. While love encompasses aspects of unconditional acceptance and commitment, inclusion underscores deliberate efforts towards equity, diversity, and allyship. New research shows that inclusion, like love, is also a feeling.

An important difference between love and inclusion is how and in what direction they are expressed. Love is described as an act that we can express toward others—friends, colleagues, pets—and toward ourselves. But it is also something we can experience in our work and vocations, through art, in nature, and in other non-human relational experiences. Inclusion, however, is generally limited to interpersonal dynamics, climates and communities, and cultures. Love is also characterized by physical affection, which is not necessarily a characteristic component of inclusion. These similarities and differences suggest that inclusion may be one piece of the larger puzzle of love.

So, what can love teach us about inclusion? We can think of love as a guiding force that illuminates pathways to deeper connection and understanding. Inclusive leaders can reflect on how care and affection can cultivate environments of genuine empathy and acceptance. Expressing care and affection at work can take the form of celebrating colleagues’ achievements and offering support and encouragement. “I really love the way you handled that hard feedback; you showed grace and understanding,” is an example of how we can express care and affection at work appropriately. Love reminds us of the inherent value of every individual, encouraging us to build diversity and recognize each person’s unique value. Inclusive leadership influenced by love prioritizes compassionate communication, which can nurture a sense of belonging, promote an environment where people feel empowered to express themselves authentically. If you’ve ever thought, “Gosh, love is complicated,” it’s because love challenges us to extend ourselves beyond our comfort zones. It asks us to set aside our egos and listen attentively. Listening is especially important for inclusive leaders who want to invite and understand diverse perspectives before making decisions. Compassionate listening allows us to advocate for equitable treatment of all. By integrating the values of love into the practice of inclusive leadership, we can create spaces where people feel valued, respected, and empowered to thrive. We can think of love as a catalyst for individual growth but also as a cornerstone for building inclusive communities and organizations.

Finally, what can inclusion teach us about love? Inclusion emphasizes empathy, respect, and inviting diverse perspectives to ensure that people feel valued, understood, and an important part of a whole. It is the root of belonging and self-worth. Inclusion teaches us that love can extend to every aspect of human interaction. Through inclusion, we learn that love is about confirming the inherent worth and dignity of every individual, which includes consideration of their background, beliefs, or identity. Inclusion challenges us to recognize and celebrate diversity, and creates environments where people feel respected and empowered to contribute their unique talents, knowledge, and perspective. Inclusion also teaches us that love is not passive but requires intentional action and commitment to equity and justice, and that allyship is an act of love. Standing up for someone who is being treated unfairly or speaking up when you notice injustice are, ultimately, radical acts of love. Through inclusion, we can see that love is a transformative force that has the capacity to build bridges, dismantle oppressive barriers, and create peaceful communities where people can thrive.

Exploring love and inclusion helps us to glean important lessons about what they offer each other. Love, intricate with affection and selflessness, is a guiding force in inclusive leadership. Conversely, inclusion teaches us that love extends beyond personal relationships and should pay attention to diverse perspectives, equitable treatment, and conscious allyship. While many argue that love is innate and cannot be taught, mounting evidence suggests otherwise. One way we can better understand love is through inclusive leadership. Accordingly, new questions arise about the intersections between love and inclusion such as: How do power dynamics shape how we express love and practice inclusion? What is the influence of cultural context on the expression of love and inclusion? How does personal history influence our ability to love and include others? Exploring these avenues can deepen our understanding of how love and inclusion shape interpersonal dynamics, organizational cultures, and societal structures, offering pathways to greater compassion, equity, and belonging in our communities.