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Can money buy happiness during the holidays? Despite concerns over a lingering recession, holiday spending in the United States has increased over 50% from last year. According to an American Research Group study, the average American will spend over $650 on holiday gifts in 2010, up from $417 in 2009 and $431 in 2008. But what does all of that spending actually buy? Can it really make the holidays happier?
For many, the holidays are a time of increased stress and depression. Anxiety levels peak when long to-do lists get out of control and family gatherings become more work than relaxation. The Mayo Clinic also cites unrealistic expectations as a common cause of holiday blues. Whether those expectations come in the form of materialistic desires or hopes for emotional satisfaction, not getting what we want is often cause for disappointment. So what are some guidelines that can help guide us toward more peaceful and happy holidays? In Thrive - Finding Happiness the Blue Zones Way, the world's happiest people reveal their secrets for contentment and satisfaction. These tools can be especially helpful during the holidays. Use this list of do's and don'ts to help navigate your way toward a peaceful and content holiday season.
Do's and don'ts for holiday happiness:
• Do take time to socialize. Even if family members are spread across the country during the holidays, find time to celebrate with people who make you happy. Research shows that the happiest people spend six to seven hours each day socializing. Holiday parties, neighborhood gatherings, volunteer activities and church services all offer excellent opportunities to increase your happiness.
• Do evaluate your expectations: Denmark is home to some of the happiest people in the world. To explain the phenomenon, the Danes have been accused of having low expectations. But, in fact, the secret to their happiness may lie in the fact that their expectations are well placed. They don't aspire to accumulate great wealth or power, but rather find satisfaction in activities that cultivate authentic happiness. This holiday season evaluate your own expectations. Are your desires realistic? Could you be happy with less? Assess whether or not your wish list will create long term satisfaction or simply short term entertainment.
• Do invest in experiences: Consider purchasing activities rather than objects this holiday season. Spending money on family vacations, dance classes, ongoing education, music lessons, scuba diving and so forth is more likely to provide you with a lasting sense of well being than buying the latest fashions or splurging on a new toy.
• Don't increase your credit card debt. The average American household has a debt balance of more than $8000 on a whopping eight credit and debit cards. This debt is a sure source of ongoing stress. Set a realistic budget for holiday shopping, and try to pay cash for your purchases. When you pay cash, the process of actually counting out the bills will make you feel the purchase, which may prevent you from overspending on a frivolous purchase.
• Don't underestimate quality time at home. The holiday errand list can be overwhelming. Try to find a balance between outside obligations and quiet time at home with family. Then create a home environment that will encourage meaningful connection. Turn off the TV; surround yourselves with pictures and mementos that are valuable to you as a family. Encourage the family to create a permanent "pride shrine" in the home to remind each member of the people, accomplishments and events that make them proud.
• Don't get bogged down in materialism: In Thrive, Psychology Professor Ed Diener talks about the dangers of becoming too materialistic. He explains that "materialistic people are seldom the happiest people because they want too much." Researcher Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi backs him up by noting that billionaires in America are only slightly happier than those with average incomes. While holiday spending is on the rise in 2010, there are no reports which indicate that holiday happiness is on the rise. Spend less on material goods this holiday season and instead, invest in the experiences and people that will cultivate long term happiness.
Learn more:
• Test your happiness. Take the True Happiness Compass
• Learn to create a "pride shrine" (video)
• Read more about Thrive
