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Trauma
Life Lessons Learned from a Dog
Some of the best models of resilence are our beloved pets.
Posted November 5, 2010
In Memory of Roan, a Much Loved German Shepherd Rescue
Lady came to us literally at the end of her rope. After being tied to something somewhere in the DC, she somehow snapped herself out of it. This pup arrived silent and afraid, her tiny protruding bones covered in muddy black fur. We didn't know much about her except that she was tied up with a string, malnourished, and afraid of large men and fire. God only knows what those worried eyes had seen. In the weeks that followed, Lady found her bark, gained some weight, learned to play ball, made a nest out of warm blankets, and obsessively licked faces. This dog who had endured trauma as a puppy with a difficult past and who ran through the city tired, hungry, scared, and alone; managed to love life more than any creature I have ever encountered.
In the morning, Lady doesn't wake up she crashes in to it. Jumping off her bed and onto ours, Lady covers our faces with a mouth full of half eaten grains. Once she knows she has assaulted us with the morning, crazy Lady squeals at the door with barely contained joy. When it cracks open, Lady needles her nose through the small opening in hopes of bolting through to run full throttle in circles around the bushes. Seeing this display one can imagine that in a former life Lady wore a saddle. Back inside Lady refuels with grains that she swallows whole after all food is far too good to chew! Dizzy from her workout and full belly, Lady wearily searches for a warm body with whom to nap. Her cravings for affection, touch and the presence of another may lead to cramming her body into Missy's, the patient West Highland White Terrier, pen. Or she may want to find a sleeping human with who she can share inhales and exhales, Lady especially loves to sleep face to face.
If Lady died at this very moment, I believe that she would not have any regrets. I also believe that her resilience and utter love for life kept her alive on the street. Yes, I am talking about a dog! In a world where words such as hope and change have become just words and despair seems to surround those who have lost loved ones in war, homes in foreclosure, and families to disease, resilience is all we have left. I have found that some of the best models of resilience are our beloved pets. So here are the life lessons I have learned from mine.
Every day is a new day: Maybe yesterday she endured the dreaded bath or was attacked by a chipmunk, but today Lady's slate is entirely clean, and she is present focused. Lady learns from her mistakes, does not let her past haunt her, and does not let setbacks keep her from moving on and enjoying another day of running free, napping, and chewing on bones. She shakes it off and moves on.
Avoid danger: Lady does not apologize for protecting herself. If she is afraid she will run away. If she needs help she will ask for it. If she doesn't like you she will avoid you. And if you continue to bother her she will set boundaries. Growling usually does the trick.
Seek pleasurable and new experiences: The world is Lady's oyster, and she is excited to be a part of it. She enjoys taking in the new smells, sights, and sounds which surround her. She takes small risks like placing her paw in the pool before totally giving up on the experience. When something makes her happy she indulges in it. This may include pilfering a bag of cookies from her father's lunch bag carelessly thrown on the floor. If she likes to play ball, she won't stop until we are both exhausted by it. When she decides that she has found a new "hobby," she makes sure that it becomes a daily practice. This may include dropping a ball, covered in deer turds on my face in the morning.
Find friends: Lady enjoys the company of others. When she needs attention she goes out and gets it. She is never afraid to ask for love. She puts energy into loving those that love back and is forever loyal to them. When Lady has had enough interaction, she enjoys her alone time in the quiet moments sitting in the yard watching the birds or escaping to the quiet of the guest room.
Take care of your body: Although Lady will quietly endure the embarrassment of a Santa hat or humiliation of a bright yellow doggie rain slicker for our enjoyment, she does take pride in her appearance. Matted fur is chewed, paws are licked, and the muzzle is wiped clean against the side of the couch. Lady also minds her figure. If she sits too long she must get up and move. Inactivity leads to excessive dog napping and grogginess. Lady is unwilling to diet, she just eats what she likes until she is full and spits out the rest. Lady is highly in tune to her body rhythms. When she is tired from the day's activities, she takes a nap on her bed. When she is sick, Lady will not move until she is well no matter what is going on in the rest of the house.
Dr. B wants to know the life lessons you have learned from your pet! Please feel free to join the discussion and share.