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Motivation
Beware the Absolutes!
Mental performance techniques sometimes need adaptation.
Posted November 13, 2018
Beware the absolutes: “Always.” “Never.” “Musts” and “shoulds.” Beliefs, attitudes, and techniques need adaptation at times. It might be a change in circumstances, or perhaps the “rule” really doesn’t fit your personality or performance style.
This is true even in the field of sport and performance psychology, where there are a number of tried and true techniques. The “classic” techniques of sport psychology, adapted from cognitive-behavioral methods, include positive thoughts, goal setting, imagery, tension management, and self-talk.
Let me give you some examples:
Remember to stay positive! Well, thinking positively is generally a good thing. It’s forward directed, adds to your confidence. If the proverbial “glass” is going to be at the half-way mark, why not pay attention to the way that it’s half full rather than half empty?
The problem: There’s a fine line between optimism and denial, that is, not paying attention to the reality of the situation. (In fact, research evidence actually acknowledges that people who are depressed are often more realistic.)
So why is optimism a problem? Let’s take Cynthia (not her real name) as an example. A 16-year-old figure skater, she has boundless energy, loves her sport, and is eager to be on the ice. When she broke her right tibia (the big bone in her lower leg), she learned that she wouldn’t be able to skate for 4-6 weeks. Frustrated with the cast, she nonetheless counted the days until the 4 weeks was up.
And indeed, the cast came off at 4 weeks… so that her leg could be fully examined.
After an x-ray, it turned out that the bone hadn’t yet completely “knit” and so she needed a new cast.
Cynthia was devastated. Yes, it was only for another 2 weeks and she had already endured twice that long. But, having pinned all her hopes on the 4-week mark, the final two weeks felt like 2 years.
What could Cynthia have done? Well, she might have used what I call the “One-Two” Method; that is, empathy and acknowledgment of her disappointment and frustration, followed by some version of “it’s just two weeks more.”
Always set goals! In performance, goal setting is an important element. Goal setting might involve long-term goals (“I want to feel capable of completing the audition for X orchestra if an opening for my instrument comes up.”) or short-term goals (“I plan to swim my next race X seconds better than last time.”). Or, setting three levels of goals at one’s next road race (great, good, and tolerable).
But in some circumstances, even those straight-forward plans become irrelevant to the situation. In The Long Distance Edge—Part I, I wrote about my friend “Emma” and her challenging trek in the Himalayas. As she became more physically challenged, she recognized:
“I needed to drop all the extraneous details—like taking photos or complaining about the food. I had to stop setting little goals and then having to manage the emotional disappointment when I couldn't meet them. I truly had to stay in the ‘eternal present’: taking the next step and the next. I needed to pay attention just to keeping one foot going in front of the other and not falling.”
Imagery/visualization will improve your performance. Well, yes, if…I love doing imagery, whether for myself or with people I work with. It’s a terrific way to practice without taxing your body. Sometimes you can be playful, or alter the image to fit your needs.
But imagery is generally an individual thing. In The Sport Psych Handbook, my colleague Shane Murphy gives an example of how he learned this the hard way: An elite ice skater found that if he imagined a ball of energy inside him, he felt focused and confident. When Dr. Murphy shared this image with some young figure skaters—after all, it had worked with this elite skater—their experience involved various imaginal catastrophes. For example, one skater imagined the ball exploding inside him; another imagined a helium-filled balloon, she spoke in a high, squeaky voice.
Breathing is our first (and to my mind, most important) performance technique. Again: Well, yes, if… Whether a performer is told to “just relax, take a deep breath” or learns the basics of mindfulness—the advice has become ubiquitous.
A diligent client spoke with me recently about learning mindfulness meditation, yet finding that it really didn’t decrease her anxiety. She had learned to just pay attention to her breath going in and out.
I asked her to show me how she did this simple (and necessary!) element of living. As she did, I could see her chest rise with her in-breath and fall as she exhaled. Not surprisingly (to me), she was breathing so shallowly that she was, at a physiological level, experiencing even more tension with every breath. Helping her breathe diaphragmatically (see my prior blogs on breathing) gave her the freedom to truly make use of non-judgmental acceptance. Not all breathing is the same.
Self-talk is essential. This is sort of back to the positives. I’m reminded of an old cartoon in which a worried student thinks “I’m sure I’m going to fail.” Or a client of mine, using exercise as a sure-proof method of managing her depression, going cross-country skiing, repeating to herself, each time she pushed off, “sickie, sickie, sickie.” It was no wonder that she came back from that outing more depressed and self-loathing than when she had started out.
Don’t get me wrong. The basic mental skills and performance techniques are really important and useful. Just steer clear of absolutes and formulas designed for everyone. Sometimes, it makes sense to go in an alternate direction. Make sure that you use mental performance techniques in a way that actually supports and enhances your performance!
