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In January, The Doctors TV show called to see if I’d appear on an episode about Electroconvulsive Therapy (ECT). These requests always emerge when I don’t have time to deal with them, always urgent, always asking me to talk as a patient despite the over a decade’s worth of advocacy I’ve done promoting research for mental health. Strangely enough, the research our family foundation funded focuses on early detection of disease and discovering biomarkers to better assign treatment; tools that would catch problems early enough to avoid ECT altogether. No one seems interested in that. Not enough sizzle to spike ratings.
Despite this and the flack I get from the anti-ECT establishment, I still talk about ECT. Why? If someone is intractably depressed, medications and therapies have failed, ECT is still the best option available. ECT saved my life in 2001 and ECT got me back on track in 2007 and twice in 2016 before my depression became dangerous. Did I have memory issues? Yes, but minor issues, most of which resolved themselves in about 6-8 weeks following the last ECT treatment. The immediate relief of ECT allowed me to implement the lifestyle changes I needed to stay healthy; hard to do if curled in the fetal position or barraged with suicidal thoughts.
I set up for my skype interview with The Doctors in my house. Lighting was bad, so we had a mad scramble to find a desk lamp to shine on my face (so much for the glamour of TV). I wired up and watched the segments preceding mine on my computer, “how to deter aggressive dudes at the gym by farting.” The three attractive doctor hosts (an emergency room doc, a dermatologist and a plastic surgeon) bantered and laughed while I sunk into my chair. Really? Are you kidding me? Then a segment about food poisoning by oysters (okay, that’s useful). Then the dangers of reverse home circumcision (dead serious, check it out). I was screaming at my assistant to cancel. Clearly, this show was what my twenty-something kids call “sketch” and I didn’t want my name tainted by association. Give me NPR damn it, I am respectable.
I heard the producer in my ear, “20 seconds.” This was a train wreck in slow motion. Go forward and be humiliated? Retract out of pride and miss the opportunity to help some person, sitting in her living room, looking at the glowing tube as a last glimmer of hope?
I went forward. To my surprise, this was perhaps the most human explanation of ECT I’ve ever seen. Dr. Sportelli (their guest psychiatrist) gave a thoughtful overview of ECT. He’s so handsome I might be tempted to head to New Jersey for a tune-up (just kidding, well, maybe not!). Next, they skyped to me, asking questions in a kind and considerate way.
Interviews this way are strange. I spoke looking into the camera of my desktop but looked down to the screen for their reactions. Despite this weird mechanized interaction, the end result stunned me. The Doctors probably reached more people in a more human way than any talk or program in which I’d participated (including Dr. Oz).
The experience got me thinking. I’ve been meditating consistently, 89 days since I made this daily commitment. Frequently I start my meditations by repeating the eight pillars of Buddhism: Perspective, Humor, Humility, Acceptance, Forgiveness, Gratitude, Compassion and Generosity. If I apply those pillars to this experience, something magical happens. If I am humble, unworried about respectability or how I appear, perhaps I can have a greater impact. And, if I can have a sense of humor about this, I have great fodder for a comedy skit at some later point in my life.
Still, it’s tough when the guy who wrote The Penis Book got his book plastered on the screen, and there was no mention of my book, Struck by Living, or the research we’ve funded or even my last name. I’m just the woman who had ECT, not credentialed and granted less time airtime than the farts.
“Breathe in, breathe out,” I tell myself, reminding myself of what Norah Ephron’s mother said about situations like this. Write it down, it’s copy.
Links to The Doctors:
Explanation of ECT with Dr. Sportelli
Me (Julie Hersh) Talking about Personal Experience with ECT
Entire Doctors Episode: Farts, Penis talk and ECT
I talk about the way I stay well briefly in The Doctor’s episode. It’s critical to maintain wellness to avoid relapse. Here’s more information:
Wellness Tactics I use to Maintain Mental Health
For more information about Julie K Hersh or her book Struck by Living (available in Spanish as Decidí Vivir) check out the Struck by Living website.
