Leadership
How Molding Character in Childhood Forges Adult Leadership
Lessons learned from the life of former U.S. Navy Acting Secretary Thomas Modly.
Updated March 24, 2024 Reviewed by Abigail Fagan
Key points
- Principled character forms early in life.
- Quiet demeanor, integrity, and focus on meaningful endeavors in youth can lead to lifetime success.
- Kids' obsessive pursuit of attention, acceptance, and popularity can lead to lifelong destructive behaviors.
![Source: Photo courtesy of the United States Navy and Wikimedia Commons. Source: Photo courtesy of the United States Navy and Wikimedia Commons.](https://cdn2.psychologytoday.com/assets/styles/article_inline_half_caption/public/field_blog_entry_images/2024-03/Thomas_Modly_and_Gary_Young_180519-N-WO404-018_(41529920344).jpg?itok=JD96KWLr)
“Strive for excellence without arrogance. Be a person of integrity.” —The Superintendent’s Guidelines to Live By, introduced in 1997 by Admiral Charles Larsen, superintendent of the United States Naval Academy, "for everyone at the (Naval) Academy.”
Good advice, especially for military personnel and athletes. and everyone else.
A person who exudes those qualities is former Acting Secretary of the United States Navy Thomas B. Modly who led the Navy from November 24, 2019, to April 7, 2020.
Modly resigned from his job in the aftermath of the USS Theodore Roosevelt controversy involving the handling of the COVID outbreak aboard the Roosevelt aircraft carrier to remove the inflammatory attention created, which Modly believed was a distraction for the Navy.
Resigning placed Navy and country interests above his own, a prime example of unselfish humility and integrity.
Why the focus on Modly? Because I have known him since his junior high school days in Shaker Heights, Ohio. I witnessed his formative years through my community involvement and can attest to his high character and integrity.
His youth and career serve as an excellent example for young athletes.
Sowing the Seeds of Greatness
![Photo Courtesy of Thomas B. Modly. Photo Courtesy of Thomas B. Modly.](https://cdn2.psychologytoday.com/assets/styles/article_inline_half_caption/public/field_blog_entry_images/2024-03/Tom%20Modly%201.0.jpg?itok=aoylQW-I)
Much can be learned by athletes, coaches, teachers, and parents, via a careful look at the developmental years of successful people.
Chronicled in two previous “Sports Between the Ears” posts The Roots of Success: Humility, Curiosity, Purpose and More Roots of Success: Focus, Respect, Unselfishness were the youthful days of other successful people I watched grow up, and how their seeds of greatness were sown.
Now it’s Modly’s turn.
COVID Tainting
Sadly, Modly’s actions during the Theodore Roosevelt incident were widely misrepresented by the media, resulting in his character being unfairly tarnished.
The purpose of this post is not to debate what happened during those turbulent, confusing COVID days, but rather to illuminate Modly’s formative years, and how they contributed to the building of his impressive character.
Suffice it to say that an objective knowledge of the circumstances and facts surrounding the Theodore Roosevelt incident will reveal the true excellence in character of Modly.
Did Modly err in any way? He fully acknowledges mistakes, minus the media misrepresentation, in his recent book, Vectors, and in the subsequent interview for this post. Such ownership of responsibility is another testament to his integrity.
Let’s move on.
Career Resume
Modly graduated from the United States Naval Academy in 1983. He served on active duty in the Navy as an officer helicopter pilot. He held leadership positions with several private sector corporations.
He taught political science at the United States Air Force Academy, and later served as Deputy Under Secretary of Defense for Financial Management and was the first executive director of the Defense Business Board.
Modly was nominated as Under Secretary of the Navy by President Donald Trump in September 2017, and assumed the Acting Secretary of the Navy position in November 2019.
A Common Denominator
![Photo courtesy of Thomas B. Modly. Photo courtesy of Thomas B. Modly.](https://cdn2.psychologytoday.com/assets/styles/article_inline_half_caption/public/field_blog_entry_images/2024-03/Tom%20Modly%20B%20&%20W%20Kid.jpg?itok=29Rp49n6)
Modly shared similar characteristics displayed by the successful people in their youth discussed in the aforementioned SBE articles.
One of the most salient common traits was a quiet demeanor. Tom wasn’t an attention seeker in endless pursuit of popularity, as so many young people can fall prey to.
Living life obsessed with gaining acceptance from peers is a recipe for problematic tendencies that can lead to alcohol and drug abuse, and other destructive behaviors.
Not Tom.
Quiet demeanor and humility were enough to earn him endearment and respect.
“When you’re young I don’t think any of those kinds of things (positive characteristics) are intentional,” Modly reflected in an interview for this post. ‘They evolve out of things innate to your character, and also from your upbringing, and from examples set by people you admire.
“I was an immigrant kid (from Hungary),” Modly continued. “During the early years in Cleveland Heights (the Cleveland suburban hometown of NFL brothers Jason and Travis Kelse), I went to Taylor Elementary School, where I would say half of the kids were Jewish, but I lived in a very Irish Catholic neighborhood.”
“Even though my family is Catholic, I always felt there was something different about us,” explained Modly, “But I think I benefited tremendously from that. Most of my friends growing up, then, were Jewish kids, and I remember walking to school every day with the kid next door who was two years older than me. When you’re that young, and you’re with somebody who’s older, it’s a humbling experience.”
“English was not my first language, Hungarian was first,” Modly shared. “We were a little different from everybody else. I think that can be humbling in a lot of ways and creates and feeds character.”
Humility is an obvious part of Modly’s character, exemplified by how he puts others ahead of himself.
“If you’re in public service you should go to work every day and believe that you’re the least important person in your life,” Modly maintained, “because your organization has a mission, and that mission is important for the nation.
“You have a lot of people relying on you to make the right decisions,” he observed. “A lot of people are into pomp and circumstance (of a leadership position) and like being the center of attention. If it bleeds over into arrogance, then it can bleed into dangerous waters.”
“Excellence (and service) without arrogance,” as Admiral Larsen asserted.
Doing What Matters
Popularity and attention-seeking are endeavors delivering short-term satisfaction, but little in the way of lasting value.
“I didn’t need to be that guy on the phone all the time, that type of thing,” Modly reflected on his youth. “I had longer-term visions, and my parents were very focused on education. I gained a lot of confidence in my ability to do well, academically.”
That’s another ingredient of successful people in their youth and documented on previous SBE pages. They were focused on important, big-picture goals, not the short-term thrills of popularity, alcohol, drugs, video gaming, phone activities, and other time wasters.
Modly’s early focus on academic excellence paved the way for his admission to the United States Naval Academy, Georgetown, and Harvard.
Humor and Leadership
“Keep a sense of humor and be able to laugh at yourself.” Another of Admiral Larsen’s “Superintendent’s Guidelines to Live By.”
“Humor is a huge part of leadership,” Modly explained. “When you’re in desperate or dire circumstances, having a sense of humor is indispensable.
“I remember meeting you (SBE author) as a teenager, and you were so funny,” reminisced Modly, “and I was like—wow—this is an older person, and he’s funny. I started picking up on that, learning how to do that, and that became a big part of the things I tried to do.”
Summing It Up
Observing young people, not only contributes to building the future of other kids, but also for self-improvement purposes, and the importance of the example set for the young people by coaches, parents, teacher, etc.
The seeds of greatness are sown early in life. Pay attention to cultivating integrity, humility, and the correct approach to the pursuit of excellence on the athletic field, in the classroom, at home, and everywhere else.
Principled character sown in childhood reaps endless benefits throughout life.
One final takeaway. Somebody actually likes and appreciates my sense of humor!
References
Modly, T.B. (2023). Vectors. Charleston, SC: Advantage Media Group