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Fear

What Do You Regret Most?

What is your biggest fear? What’s holding you back?

Recently, I had the chance to participate in an intimate salon for 65 women leaders of different ages, hosted by the inimitable Jacqueline Novogratz, CEO of the Acumen Fund, and Batool Hassan, a Business Development Manager at Acumen. (This is a photo of Jacqueline, and that's my left shoulder on the bottom right...) The evening gave us all a chance to stand up and speak honestly about our lives. We were each asked to share with the group our answer to the following question:

For the older generation:

If you could go back and change one decision in your life, what would it be?

and for the younger generation:

What is your biggest fear? What’s holding you back?

Since I'm 43 and there were women there in their early 20s, I declared myself a member of the older generation and answered the first question. I spoke of my regret at having masqueraded all my life as a Practical Person (corporate attorney, etc.) when really I'm attracted to pursuits that are supposedly less grounded, like book-writing and prodigious chocolate-eating. But of course I don't completely regret the choices of my early adulthood. I enjoyed my years as a lawyer, and in a twisty-turny way, they led me to where I am today.

Five of us were also asked to give longer talks, and I spoke about -- what else? -- the powers of introversion! Many people came up to me afterwards to share their own experiences of being quiet in a world that can't stop talking.

Anyway, I thought it would be interesting to have our own salon here, asking the same questions. So here goes: If you could go back and change one decision in your life, what would it be? (If you prefer, you could also answer the question about your fears for the future.)

(My participation in the women's salon was my latest foray in my Year of Speaking Dangerously. For those who are joining me by participating in the public speaking part of the QUIET Revolution, please also post a comment on how you're coming along. And remember, you can join at any time.)

If you like this blog, you might like to pre-order my forthcoming book, QUIET: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking.

Also, be sure to sign up for my newsletter. Get blog updates, plus a chance to win a half-hour coaching phone session with me. (Periodic drawings.)

For earlier posts on the Power of Introverts, please visit my website here.

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