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Society has succumbed to the influence of others, most of them far from where we live and work. We now distrust the accuracy and truthfulness of print, television, and spoken media, and are weary of “opinions” that often represent emotions and not verified facts. Internally, the turmoil develops into frustration. Fabrication diminishes our confidence, similar to realizing that the Wizard of Oz was a fraud, appearing to be someone he was not. With growing frustration, suspiciousness, and mistrust, we become rejectionists until verifiable information emerges. While others would have us engage in accepting their rhetoric, we must first acquire confidence in ourselves.
Influence enters into every aspect of our lives to include turmoil, overreaction, political misstep, selfishness, erratic and false claims, and all categories of conflicting messages. When we rely on others, networks, and people, we may irrationally overreact to external pressures.
In a mentally exhausted state, we become reactionary, supporting or denigrating the latest accusation without determining sustainable solutions. We rave, rant, and lose perspective. We rush into the vortex of irresponsibility and bemoan existing conditions. However, change is elusive unless grounded in truth.
Yes, the COVID-19 virus has changed our work and outside activities, elevating caution, but in reality, has it been as traumatic as anticipated? Is it not the time for self-reflection, to observe one’s inner self, and determine the sources of stress and adversity? Utilizing personal strengths or the assistance of others to determine how we overcome and return to a balanced life?
To assist with personal explanation, a book I co-authored, Building Resilience, offers advice that is self-initiated and achievable. It provides the following five action steps to overcome stress and adversity.
- Be flexible. Clear thinking provides access to possibilities and choices.
- Problem-solve. This step can be done by yourself or with others. Social media allows for contact with people you trust. Utilize when necessary.
- Manage strong feelings. When distressed or struggling with an aspect of life, seek to self-manage, regaining control to self-help and restore balance.
- Believe and trust in yourself. No act is too small nor insignificant. Determine meaning, purpose, and motivation in your life and pursue them.
- Connect and communicate. Family, friends, colleagues, and professionals can help in various degrees; the key is not to continually struggle without overcoming that which is troubling.
Additional aspects include: a) believe in your abilities, b) trust your judgment, c) determine what motivates you, d) seek out others who share similar values, and e) join them to seek answers and sort out questions.
Attaining balance occurs when we decide to regain control and management of self and implement renewal. Personal resilience enables goal achievement and proper self-management. It is yours to acquire; start now.
Guest blogger: Dr. Richard Lumb is a former Associate Professor at the University of North Carolina at Charlotte, Northern Michigan University and he is Emeritus from the State University of New York at Brockport where he was chair of the Criminal Justice Department.
