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Key points
- Self-care is about the systems and practices that support one's relationship with oneself.
- Self-awareness is key to preventing burnout.
- Stressing wisely means understanding that stress is natural and that a multifaceted approach to wellness is necessary for optimal functioning.
What is your history with self-care?
This question felt like hitting a brick wall at a max speed of hustling, performing, delivering, and doing. What is my history with self-care? My history of self-care at times is dialed-in, consistent, and glorious. I created systems that dramatically decreased the comeback rate (the time it takes to bounce back from fatigue or stressors) and other times, my self-care practices were completely abandoned. Despite knowing that my systems kept me healthy, well and whole, they would fall to the wayside when the "doing needed to be done." And during this season of neglecting my self-care practices, I paid a high price.
Join me as I tackle the big question: Why is self-care so hard? This work is intended as a road map for having it all in a way that actually works for you, sustainably. It is my winning formula to support you in sustaining yourself, your work, and all you care about, wisely.
Active Recovery as Self-Care
It takes active effort on our part to prioritize and integrate our self-care as successful professionals. Being aware of our well-being and how we are feeling on a routine basis is critical to preventing burnout. Self-awareness is key. We can practice checking in with ourselves, listening to the information our bodies give us about what we need to be and stay well.
Here are some of my go-to's:
Basics Done Right: Sleep, nutrition, and movement. Basics done right yield excellent results. Remember that consistency and commitment is more important than perfection. There is no 100% perfection score for physical health. Shoot for an 80% success rating in "helpful health decisions." I like to use this idea: I can miss one day of physical activity but not two days in a row. This has been a game-changer for me. In a month, I inevitably get a minimum of 15 workouts in with this system.
Take Regular Breaks: Schedule meetings as much as possible with time in between to get up from your desk, stretch, drink water, and take some deep breaths. Be sure to take the breaks before you feel as though you need to. You charge your phone when the low battery indicator is on. What would your low battery indicator look like? How often would you stop to recharge?
Dr. Rob Archer’s "3 Ps" for In-Between Meetings: In the 30 seconds between meetings, practice these three Ps:
- Process – Name the feeling you are experiencing at this moment.
- Present – Bring yourself to the moment. Ground your feet, touch a cold surface, breathe.
- Pick – Select a feeling, intention, or approach you want to bring into your next meeting.
In as little as 30 seconds, you can show up in an active mindset for what is next.
Schedule "Alone With My Good-Feeling Thoughts" Time: It is so important to tend to ourselves by noticing our thoughts, feeling our feelings, and reflecting on what it is that we need. You are not needy; you have needs.
Say "No" Without a Reason or Feeling Guilty: We cannot do all the things! Learning to say no to new projects, tasks, meetings, or favours that we don’t need to do is a critical skill and allows us more time for the first three tips above.
Ask for Help: This one is the sweet spot. We do not have to do everything on our own – we can ask for help when we need it. Having an accountability partner for active recovery is crucial. Can you schedule regular check-ins? For example, twice a month for 15 minutes. Quick report backs. Set an intention for the next 2 weeks.
Stress Wisely™ Practices
Self-care looks like caring for all aspects of ourselves and meeting our various needs for rest, play, expansion, and reflection. There will always be stress, but there is a way to stress wisely. Stressing wisely means understanding the various realms of wellness, where we may be experiencing stress, and where to apply some self-care. My stressing-wisely framework and practices are based on the 8 Realms of Wellness research.[i] These include needs that are:
- Physical: Sleep, Nutrition, Movement, Disease Management
- Intellectual: Learning, Growing, Perspective Taking, Stimulation, Curiosity, Wonder
- Emotional: Feelings, Forgiveness, Comfort
- Social: Community, Family, Friends, Altruism, Justice
- Environmental: Safety, Order, Living Spaces, Care for the Lands. Future Footprints
- Spiritual: Meaning, Purpose, Vocations, Living Rightly
- Financial: Resources, Needs Met, Security
- Occupational: Capacity, Routines, Engagement, Recognition, Purpose
For high-performance professionals, cultivating life with work integration requires reflection on our particular self-care and active recovery needs. The following questions will yield instrumental data to integrate with your unique values.
