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By Meridith L. Ambrose, M.A.
We feel our emotions not only with our minds (or our hearts) but often in our bodies. Whether it’s a “gut feeling” that something is not “right,” or a tension that makes our head hurt, our emotional processing is tied to our bodies. And sometimes our bodies can even hold on to feelings from our past.
Traditionally, Americans, and Western Culture in general, separated mind and body, locating emotions in our minds. Yet increasingly, research, informed by Eastern philosophy and practices, such as yoga, reiki, and acupuncture, tell us how our emotions are influenced by our physical well-being, and perhaps more significantly, how our bodies express our feelings.
Of course, many common sayings use body metaphors to describe feelings:
- “I have a lot on my shoulders.”
- “This is a pain in the neck.”
- “What a headache.”
- “My job is at a break neck pace right now.”
- “The thought of it makes me queasy.”
These phrases describe emotional experiences, but our bodies can actually reveal how we feel. Our heart rates elevate when we’re afraid, angry, or even falling in love. Our breathing can change even before we realize that a work project is making us anxious. At times, we may not even be aware that we’re emotionally taxed, because we are feeling the stress exclusively in our bodies.
Scott
Scott came to therapy after noticing a mood shift. He was having difficulty getting motivated to go to work in the morning and completing his work by the end of the day. Although he had a high stress job, it had never bothered him before. In fact, he used to take pleasure in being able to handle the stress.
Now, he was having chest pains and headaches, and at times a queasiness that made him feel he might throw up. He was also frequently losing his voice—it didn’t exactly hurt like a sore throat, but felt strained and unusable. After his doctor failed to find a reason for concern or any physical ailment that would account for his symptoms, Scott knew “something was off” with how he was dealing with his work.
As Scott began to talk about his symptoms with me, he realized that his physical discomforts began a couple of weeks before he experienced his mood change. He said that they were usually worse on his way to work. I wondered aloud to him if there might be any meaning to his feeling sick in the morning. He made the connection that he would go over his schedule before work, which was around the time his stomach began hurting. As we looked more closely at his morning routine, we realized that he was dreading a particular new project because his partner on the project was dismissive and belittling.
In time, we connected his experiences with this deprecating coworker to how he used to feel dumb and incapable with certain teachers at school. Before those classes, he would feel so sick he would ask to be dismissed. In a way, his stomach pain, while very unpleasant, helped him avoid an even more unpleasant experience, namely being publicly embarrassed by his teachers.
This coping strategy was resurfacing years later at his job, but now as an adult and more able to advocate for himself, he was losing his voice. Although he wanted to confront his coworker, he felt helpless to speak up for himself.
Through our process, Scott learned to use his physical symptoms as a means of accessing his feelings. By understanding how he communicated his discomfort, anger, and conflict avoidance through his body, he was able to put words to what he previously experienced as meaningless irritations. Knowing that his symptoms were meaningful, Scott could move from passively suffering to grappling with how he might change how he interacts with others. Now, he is able to release himself from the pains he feels in his body by translating them into emotions and speaking up for himself.
What to do
If you are experiencing physical symptoms you think might be emotionally based —
- Get a check-up, so your doctor can rule out any potential physical cause.
- Reflect on new stressors to see if you can make a connection between your symptoms and changes in your work-life, family-life and/or love-life.
- Get professional help — if your emotions are manifesting as physical symptoms, you most likely need a professional to guide you through the process towards health.
Meridith Ambrose, M.A., studies clinical psychology at Adelphi University. She is conducting her dissertation research on the somatic experiences of professional women. She is currently completing her Psychology Internship at the William Alanson White Institute and The Village Institute and plans to continue her clinical work at both institutions, with an aim of analytic training and private practice in the future.
