Suicide
Coping With Suicide Loss
A unique journey through grieving.
Posted September 23, 2021 Reviewed by Vanessa Lancaster
Key points
- Suicide is the tenth leading cause of death across all age groups and the third leading cause of death among teens and young adults globally
- Approximately 85 percent of people in the United States may know someone personally who has committed suicide.
- During the first days and months of grieving, it is normal for survivors to go through an overwhelming array of emotions.
- Suicide survivors encounter distinctive challenges that can inhibit the normal grieving process.
Approximately one million people die by suicide worldwide every year. Currently, suicide is the tenth leading cause of death across all age groups and the third leading cause among adolescents and young adults globally. Sadly, the numbers could even be 20 times higher for those who somehow made it to an emergency room following a nonfatal suicide attempt.
The complexity of suicide is the subject of extensive research. Multiple factors could be interrelated; those can be anything from the individual’s own biology to trauma exposure, level of support within their family system, mental health challenges, environmental stressors, and previous suicide attempts, to mention a few. Among suicide attempters, the most predominant feelings reported are hopelessness, despair, and isolation from families and friends.
According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control (CDC), the number of people who have suicidal thoughts and behaviors may vary by age, gender, occupation, region, ethnicity, and even the time of the year. Many suicides are not reported since it can be challenging to identify an attempt as a suicide if it manifests through a drug overdose, reckless behavior, or a car accident.
We cannot ignore the impact that suicide has on those surviving the victim. Approximately 85 percent of people in the United States may know someone personally who has committed suicide.
According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, for each suicide completed, at least six loved ones are directly touched by the loss. Worse, if we consider those affected indirectly, such as co-workers, friends, first responders, and attending medical personnel, the impact rate is higher. The American Association of Suicidology estimates that every death by suicide leaves behind 130 people who report they knew the person who died.
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The loss of a loved one by suicide can be one of the most disheartening experiences in life. The shocking and unexpected nature of suicide can often leave survivors feeling guilty, confused, angry, and ashamed. In addition, survivors are often subjected to the effects of guilt, stigma, and trauma, which can keep them away from the support and professional services they might need.
It is essential to proceed slowly during the grieving process since healing is a complex and unique process for everyone. Each individual will experience grief in their own way and pace.
During the first days and months of grieving, it is normal for survivors to go through an overwhelming array of emotions ranging from depression, denial, stress, and self-blame, to disbelief, numbness, anxiety, and abandonment in reaction to such a painful and shocking event.
It is not uncommon for survivors to struggle with comprehending the reasons surrounding the cause or possible triggers to the suicide and whether they could have done something to prevent it. Furthermore, stigma often tied to suicide represents a barrier to survivors seeking the professional help needed to heal. Conversely, stigma and ignorance might prevent those close to the survivors from accurately understanding their grief process and how to aid the grieving person. Instead, they might wait for the survivors to initiate a conversation about their loved ones or request help.
A fundamental factor in the grieving process is support from family and friends since it is not uncommon for survivors to feel as if others are blaming them for the suicide. In some cases, survivors may experience denial or hide their feelings.
Moreover, mental health challenges such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and depression could make the healing process more difficult. For that reason, those grieving a suicide victim may benefit from professional services such as individual counseling, medication, and support groups, the latter of which has been noted to be extremely therapeutic. The universality aspect of groups conveys others have experienced the same pain, which can be extremely powerful. In addition, support groups can serve to diminish the pressure or fear of judgment and shame.
Suicide survivors encounter distinctive challenges that can inhibit the normal grieving process, putting them at increased risk for developing complicated grief since many may suffer from depression and PTSD. If such conditions are left untreated, this could negatively influence the survivors’ recovery, leading to prolonged suffering and impaired functioning.
The best treatment should center on a combination of counseling, support groups, and pharmacotherapy, focusing on resolving depression, guilt, and trauma.
If you or someone you love is contemplating suicide, seek help immediately. For help 24/7, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 1-800-273-TALK, or reach out to the Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741741. To find a therapist near you, visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
References
American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. Surviving a suicide loss: A resource and Healing Guide.
Dialogues Clin Neurosci. 2012 Jun; 14(2): 177-186. doi : 10.31887/DCNS.2012.14.2/iyoung