Could the "777 Rule" Improve Your Relationship?

When life is not exactly a bowl of cherries, will the number seven help remind you what to do with your significant other?

Source: Nataliya Vaitkevich/Pexels

You may have heard people touting the "777 rule" as a way to strengthen your relationship with your significant other. And it's got nothing to do with getting lucky on a particular Boeing model of airplane. Instead, each of the three sevens corresponds to the frequency at which you should be doing three different things that can help your relationship fly. Basically, the 777 rule indicates that:

• Every seven days, you should go on a date: This should be with your significant other and not someone else. Clearly, telling your significant other, "It's Friday, so I have my weekly date with that hot coworker" ain't going to land well.
• Every seven weeks, you and your significant other should spend a night away together: A night away doesn't mean in your basement or at your in-laws. Instead, it should be away from home, like at a hotel or resort, away from others, and include an overnight stay. That's because more things, lucky things, can happen when you are together overnight somewhere.
• Every seven months, the two of you should take a romantic vacation or getaway. This should be longer than just a night away and a way to get away from it all.

The general principle behind the 777 rule makes sense: It's important for the two of you to spend quality time together away from everyone else. Such time allows the two of you to connect intellectually, emotionally, and physically. You can get a much better sense of how each of you is doing and what you think of each other and the relationship. Spending this time and making this effort also allows you to make key changes and course correct before things really fall off the rails.

Too often couples drift apart when these things don't happen. It's easy to get caught up in the minutia of life, such as "Look, my picture of me and a pizza got 100 likes" and "Oh, the kids covered themselves with gravy again," and neglect building and maintaining the emotional bond between the two of you. Resentment can fester when you don't discuss and resolve issues. The 777 rule is a way of building in time to connect and remind each other why you are together in the first place.

However, don't expect the 777 rule by itself to be a magical solution. This rule made news after actor Andrew Buchan allegedly cheated on his wife, actress Amy Nuttall. Nuttall had reportedly told Buchan that he had to follow the 777 rule to stay with her. Now, of course, only Nuttall and Buchan knew the details and dynamics of their relationship and what else they may have been doing to try to repair it. But when cheating has already occurred in your relationship, the 777 rule alone ain't going to be like avocado: Putting it on top isn't going to magically make everything better.

Also, don't get too caught up in the letter of the rule, or even the number of the rule. It doesn't have to be exactly seven days, seven weeks, and seven months. The number seven is a bit arbitrary. You don't need to say, "Honey, we can't go on a date Friday, because we just went on one Wednesday. The next one has to come next Wednesday." That could lead you to spend the next seven hours sleeping on the couch. Naturally, it's best to adjust the timing of such things to fit the two of you and your circumstances. Maybe your relationship needs these together times to be more frequent, such as a 555 rule.

Some may argue that such rules take the spontaneity and romance out of things by making it feel like you are simply fulfilling a requirement. The argument is that spending more time alone with your significant other should come naturally. If you are already spending such time with your significant other, then maybe you can deep-six the 777 rule. But for many, other aspects of life can get far too hectic and the distractions can mount. This can make it easy to lose sight of the big picture and forget that it's been way too long since you and your one-and-only have been functioning as two together. This is where numbers and some counting can help make sure that your focus is more on what really counts.

Facebook image: PeopleImages.com - Yuri A/Shutterstock