Blogs: Old Dogs, New Tricks

“He’ll never learn,” “she always was a bad kid,” and “once a cheater, always a cheater” all reflect a common belief: People never really change. While there may be a kernel of truth in this folk wisdom, it doesn’t square with recent research. PT bloggers (psychologytoday.com) set the record straight.

Brain Training

The old rule in neurology was that by age 21, our brains are done growing and that the only change is for the worse: atrophy, damage, etc. We’ve turned that old rule on its head: Neuroplasticity, the brain’s capacity to grow and change, has been clearly confirmed in human adults. By noticing and making more mindful choices about our thoughts, feelings, and reactions, we can actually change the structure, activity, and connections in our brain. Such changes are associated with increased and more balanced empathy, faster recovery after an argument, and decreased negativity bias. —Marsha Lucas, Ph.D., “Rewire Your Brain For Love”

Smarter Habits

From the brain’s perspective, every experience in our life alters our brain forever afterward, so it is constantly changing, although mostly in minute ways. MRI studies provide striking examples that quitting drugs, starting antidepressant treatments, practicing meditation, and even exercise can lead to structural and functional changes in the brain that correspond to changes in personality and behavior. —Joshua Gowin, Ph.D., “You, Illuminated”

Slow Drift

The view of personality as set in plaster by age 30 has been debunked. We now know that personality can change throughout life, to the oldest ages we can test. The idea of a midlife crisis is just as much of a myth. Many people become more self-directed and tolerant as they grow older; others spend much of their adult life looking for direction. We change in gradual ways as we learn to adapt to life’s challenges, a process that continues for as long as we do. —Susan Krauss Whitbourne, Ph.D., “Fulfillment at Any Age”

It Takes a Village

People clearly can change, but beliefs about change matter a lot. Someone who wants to change has to believe that change is possible, and the people around that individual have to believe in change as well. If the people around us do not believe that change is possible, then they will not be supportive of our efforts. Ultimately, they will continue to treat us as if we are still the same old person deep down. —Art Markman, Ph.D.,“Ulterior Motives”

Motivation Matters

The number one thing people can change is their thoughts—and as a result, their perspective. It’s just a matter of when you are ready. But sometimes we lie to ourselves about change. We say we want things to be different, but we don’t alter anything in our environment. —Goal Auzeen Saedi, Ph.D., “Millennial Media”

Trusting Yourself

Some things about ourselves we can never basically change. Introversion is fundamentally innate, as is extraversion. But we can choose to develop our “inferior function” (e.g., extraversion in introverts), which we need to do to become more balanced and whole. At the same time, we can change our attitude toward our typology by deciding to value and accept it. Most people tend to think that psychotherapy is all about change. But in my experience, it is at least as much about self-acceptance. The paradox is that by accepting ourselves as we are (rather than how we want to be or think we should be), we do change. —Stephen A. Diamond, Ph.D., “Evil Deeds”