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Are you the type of person who doesn't like to make waves? Maybe you were raised to be a "good girl." Or maybe you were taught that you should be polite and make people happy.
While being a rule follower isn't necessarily a bad thing (it can serve you well in many circumstances), there are also times when breaking the rules might be just what you need to live a better life.
Whether you break official rules (like you take a stand for a cause you believe in even though it goes against your company's policy) or you break some unofficial rules (like you quit following the gender norms in your family), rebellion might be the key to your success.
But breaking the rules can be tough, especially for women. Studies show one of the reasons women apologize more is because they have a lower threshold for wrongdoing, meaning they feel compelled to follow the rules and feel guiltier about minor rule violations than men. And there's a good chance following the rules too much might be holding women back.
Kids Who Break the Rules Become Wealthier Adults
There's substantial evidence showing that breaking rules from time to time can contribute to success—especially when these rule violations date back to childhood. Developmental Psychology published a 40-year study that found that kids who broke the rules were most likely to earn more money as adults.
The rebellious kids-turned-adults didn't necessarily have the most prestigious job titles according to society, but they were making more money than the well-behaved, studious kids.
The authors of the study said, "Perhaps the kids who broke the rules weren't afraid to ask for raises more often" or "maybe they were more likely to become entrepreneurs and innovators who blazed their own trails."
Breaking A Few Unwritten Rules Might Open Doors
You don't necessarily need to break laws or official policies to get ahead or live your best life, however. Perhaps you just need to ditch a few gender norms or quit following advice that doesn't work for you.
Perhaps you've heard Richard Branson wakes up at 5 a.m. and Tim Cook gets up by 3:45? Both of them swear waking up early is the key to success.
But don't try to convince Lori Greiner, the "Queen of QVC" and cast member of Shark Tank, that she needs to wake up early. She goes to bed between 1 and 2 a.m. And she told Parade magazine she exercises right before she goes to sleep (something most fitness gurus, sleep specialists, and mental health experts discourage). But clearly, she found something that works for her and it's helped her become one of the most successful women on the planet.
So worry less about doing what everyone else says works for them. Experiment to learn what works best for you and don't be afraid to go against the grain.
Be A Rebel With A Purpose
Don't confuse taking a healthy stand with being disrespectful, however. Ignoring rules or violating policies because you are disinterested or lazy isn't helpful. Be careful when you notice yourself saying things like "They are just going to have to deal with it."
If you are going to be a "rebel," then do so with a purpose.
Keep in mind that breaking a few rules, however, can give you the satisfaction of knowing you live your life according to your own terms. And even though some people might not be pleased with your choices, you can find strength in knowing you stay true to your values and act according to your beliefs.
