How to Make Intentional Life Decisions This Holiday Season

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People usually talk about the new year as the start of resolutions and S.M.A.R.T. goals. That means we often spend the month of December vacillating on our upcoming choices before we have a “fresh start" in January.

What if we went into December with a different mindset, though?

Let’s consider how we can truly approach 2021 with an intentional perspective. This means taking time this month to truly sit with some important check-ins and make the corresponding decisions. Let’s break it down where it really matters:

Your Job

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While it’s truly something to be grateful for if you still have a job this year at least 7.7 million people have lost their job related to COVID—it's important to check in if your job continues to align with your personal, professional, financial, and emotional goals.

Many of us can fall into the sunk cost fallacy. As said by Christopher Olivia, “The sunk cost effect is the general tendency for people to continue an endeavor, or continue consuming or pursuing an option, if they’ve invested time or money or some resource in it.” Olivola is an assistant professor of marketing at Carnegie Mellon’s Tepper School of Business and the author of the 2018 paper shared in the journal Psychological Science.

We can easily fall into this trap with our jobs if we’re not careful. Even though we may be unsatisfied on multiple fronts, we continue staying with our work because seeking change feels too overwhelming.

That being said, you need to know what you need at this time. If we look to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, the theory posits that we first seek our physiological needs (clean air, food, shelter, water) before considering our safety needs (employment, resources, property).

Thus, if your job is providing you with safety and security and you’re worried that changing your job will threaten that, it’s understandable that you might want to stay put right now.

And let’s be clear on that point: that’s OK.

However, acknowledging this for what it is can help you move towards healthy acceptance of that fact rather than denying your situation or ignoring a potential dilemma. So as long as you are aware of what your reasons are for staying or leaving your work, that’s what matters most.

Your Relationships

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This has been a trying year but there is something valuable that has come out of it. We have gained valuable data about our relationships.

Here is an activity for you to start: write out all the meaningful relationships you have in your life. Next, write down how close you feel with each person on a scale of 1 to 10.

Next, consider which relationships are going well and why. How can you continue manifesting this in the new year and further appreciate these loved ones?

With that, what relationships are suffering? Take an inventory and consider what relationships you want to keep or release that have been difficult. Consider if it’s worth having conversations with these people to see if these connections can be revived.

Your Health

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Another thing this year has shown us is how important our health really is. We often take our bodies for granted and we can especially sabotage ourselves in the month of December saying, “I’ll take better care of myself in January.”

Instead, use this time to make a list of all the ways you’d like to take good care of your health this month and into the new year.

Do you want to finally visit the dermatologist, catch up on your dental appointment you missed, and meet with a nutritionist to help you improve your eating habits? These are just a few examples to get you started.

My favorite way to re-center and prepare for the new year is with the Power Sheets Goals Planner by Lara Casey’s Cultivate What Matters.

Practice kindness to yourself

So as you sit with these important decisions going into the new year, be kind to yourself. Take the pressure off yourself to make the “perfect” decision. There’s no such thing.

Remember that no matter what you decide, you will be resilient enough to work through the outcome. You’ve gotten through 2020 if you’re reading this and you can get through these next months ahead, too. You are capable.