Ask Dr. E

Ask Dr. E

Dear Dr. E,

Is homosexuality a kind of sickness-a psychological
problem-produced by peer pressure, or inborn and natural? Can sexual
orientation change? Are there tests to see if you're straight or gay?
I'm feeling great confusion right now about my sexuality.

T, Australia

Dear T,

Mental health professionals used to consider homosexuality a type
of mental illness, but now it's seen as a normal condition that is at
least partially determined by genes. It's common for sexual orientation
to be in flux in one's teens and early twenties. One study suggests that
50 percent of the young women who believe they are homosexual end up
declaring themselves to be straight within a few years. I wouldn't
suggest taking any "tests" to determine your sexual orientation; you need
to determine that for yourself, no matter what score you get on a
test.

Dear Dr. E,

Where can I find articles on gender identity
disorder?

K, Maryland

Dear K,

The PsychINFO database, accessible at www.apa.org, or at your local
university library, makes it easy to locate articles like the ones you're
seeking. Hundreds of relevant articles about gender identity disorder
have been written in the past three years alone. You might also take a
look at a recent book on the topic, Gender Identity Disorder and
Psychosexual Problems in Children and Adolescents, by Kenneth J. Zucker,
Ph.D., and Susan J. Bradley, Ph.D.

Dear Dr. E,

My husband and I have been together for 20 years. I recently
learned that he masturbates several times a week while watching
pornography. He's also having trouble reaching orgasm during
intercourse. Is his masturbation harming his ability to climax with me?
And why does he keep insisting that I watch pornography with
him?

T, Virginia

Dear T,

Your husband, quite simply, is getting older. It's common for men
over 40 to take longer to become erect and to have trouble reaching
orgasm. Alas, many spouses automatically assume these are signs of
infidelity. It's also common for people's sexual interests to change as
they get older, with pornographic materials or, these days, medication,
playing a greater role in their sex lives. In his somewhat
autobiographical book, Enjoy Old Age, the eminent psychologist B. F.
Skinner strongly recommended that pornographic materials be used to help
keep sexual interest alive. As you and your husband grow old together,
it's important that you communicate with each other about your changing
needs.

Dear Dr. E,

What effects does parental separation or death have on
children?

M, Australia

Dear M,

There's no simple answer to this question, in part because some
children seem to be remarkably resilient to loss, while others are
devastated by it. A recent long-term study by Judith Wallerstein, Ph.D.,
suggests that divorce can have negative effects on some children well
into adulthood, impairing their ability to form lasting relationships. On
the other hand, additional, smaller studies seem to show that divorce or
separation can actually benefit some children, at least when the intact
home is highly dysfunctional. Various studies suggest that it might be
possible to teach children to be more resilient. Raising Resilient
Children by Robert Brooks, Ph.D., and Sam Goldstein, Ph.D., contains some
practical tips.