Learning to Meditate: Four Common Questions

If you are thinking about starting to meditate, it might be difficult to navigate the overwhelming numbers of self-help books on meditation and online meditation advice of varied quality.

Why meditate?

You might be wondering whether meditation would be right for you and which form you should try. How can you choose? It can be helpful if you first consider why you want to take on meditation. Is it because you are looking for a way to reduce stress or learn to deal better with your back pain, or maybe because you want to explore more deeply your purpose and meaning in life?

Your answer to the ‘why’ question can give you an initial sense of direction: If you are looking for ways to reduce stress, anxiety, or chronic pain, a mindfulness course might be a suitable start. The two most common types of mindfulness courses are mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR) and mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT). There are also increasing numbers of self-compassion courses you may want to try. These courses teach meditation outside of a religious or spiritual context.

However, if you are attracted to meditation as a means to deepen your spiritual exploration, a more traditional type might be relevant. Depending on your religious and spiritual background, you may want to learn more about meditation practices in your own religious tradition. If you are interested in Buddhist meditation, try to first learn about the main Buddhist schools – Theravada, Mahayana and Vajrayana – which have common foundations but also differ in their particular aims and meditation types.

What meditation type?

Those who are new to meditation often think that it always involves sitting cross-legged on the floor with eyes closed—that’s the stereotypical image. If sitting quietly is not your thing, you might be relieved to find out that there are many different types of meditation. There are walking meditations, thinking meditations, movement meditations such as Tai Chi, and styles emphasizing the importance of practicing meditation during everyday activities. And some meditation schools, such as Dzogchen, encourage meditating with eyes open—after all, meditation isn’t about escaping what is in front of us, but about understanding the world more deeply and learning to work with it skilfully.

Many meditation traditions also combine various meditation styles to develop different skills. For example, you may start by learning meditation to stabilize your attention—through focusing on a pebble, your breath, sounds or a sacred object, while noticing when you get distracted and gently bringing your attention back. With some attention stability established, you may focus more on practices that develop loving kindness and compassion, and then proceed to practices of insight, exploring your mind even more closely.

Another stereotype is that meditation always involves emptying your mind. I have recently spoken to a friend who said that meditation wasn’t for her because she has too many thoughts and finds it impossible to slow down and focus on one ‘boring’ thing such as a pebble or the taste of a raisin. She didn’t know that there are meditation types working primarily with thinking—for example, meditations involving contemplations on impermanence of everything around us, our bodies and our lives. There are also meditation types that rely on visualizations and other types that involve recitations of prayers or mantras.

All these different meditation types work with your mind—your awareness, thoughts, sensations, emotions—in different ways. They have been developed to accommodate a variety of inclinations and dispositions of mediation adepts. So it is very likely that there is a meditation style that suits you.

Do I need a teacher?

The short answer to this important question is that you most likely do need a teacher, particularly if you intend to take on more extensive or deeper meditation practice. With longer-term practice you will likely encounter some challenges in your practice and increasing need for guidance from an experienced teacher. It is not recommended to engage in long meditations or advanced meditation practices without first practicing foundational meditations and receiving proper instructions.

Despite there currently being an abundance of self-proclaimed meditation teachers, finding a well-qualified, experienced teacher who can provide you with authentic, long-term meditation advice is often difficult. If you are searching for an MBSR or MBCT teacher, look up information from a university-affiliated mindfulness center. Over three years of personal meditation practice is generally a good minimum with regard to the experience of such teachers (in addition to completion of standardized training). You may also ask about the number of MBSR/MBCT courses they have taught and the feedback they have received from students.

Meditation Essential Reads

How to Meditate Without a Formal Routine

Can Meditation Make Microbes Mellow?

For teachers in religious/spiritual traditions, you may want to inquire about the depth of their meditation training, what their training focused on, where they trained and who their main meditation teacher was. You can then find more information on expectations and practices in their tradition online. The requirements for personal meditation experience are typically extensive—Tibetan Buddhism teachers are, for example, often required to have cumulatively three or more years of retreat experience and continuous daily practice as well as scholarly training.

How long should I meditate for?

In traditional Buddhist writings it is often recommended to start meditation in two or three brief meditation sessions a day. They can be as short as five minutes. Once you become more accustomed to meditation and gain a bit more stability in your practice, you can slowly start extending the length of your sessions. The important thing is not to have too high expectations—focusing on your breath or a visualization for even a couple of seconds without being interrupted by distracting thoughts or emotions is a success in the initial stages of learning to meditate.

The initial meditation skills involve becoming more aware of what is happening in your mind and learning not to react to it immediately with like, dislike, judgement and criticisms. You will gradually learn to notice the distractions more readily and let go of them more easily, then without judgement return your attention to what you want to focus on during your meditation, again and again.

Try to avoid starting your meditation training by going on an intensive silent meditation retreat. For a beginner, even a few hours of sitting in silence can become physically or psychologically very challenging and bring up strong emotions, memories, etc. Moreover, try not to rely too much on sheer discipline. While developing a habit to meditate every day is helpful, repeatedly forcing yourself to meditate for long periods of time can create too much tension and you may be likely to give up because of this. Remember, meditation is not a competitive sport: You are trying to learn about your own mind, the mind only you have access to, and there are no other entries in this marathon.