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This is part two of a two-part post. Click here to read part one.
As noted in part 1 of this post, people bring to the work environment their personal problems, anger, personality disorders, controlling behaviors, psychological issues, medical concerns, addictions, family problems, and criminal and legal issues. These areas of dysfunction can manifest in any job environment. If the list above seems difficult to grasp, think about the fact that some people have co-occurring issues, meaning they have more than one problem with which they are trying to cope. I will continue below with more problem behaviors we can find in the workplace.
Retaliatory Behavior
Unfortunately, there are times when you will come across those who feel powerless and will stoop to sabotaging others’ work as a way to get back at them for a perceived slight. They will plan to discredit or actually withhold information that needs to be passed along so that others cannot effectively do their work. Years ago, I heard about a problem in a hospital lab where test results were slow to come out. As it turned out, a staff member who was angry at a coworker had decided to retaliate by holding back on their part of the testing in an effort to slow the work and make the coworker look lazy. It was later discovered that certain work was being put aside and then later put back into the “line,” which caused confusion and delayed the results. The employee who'd sabotaged the other person’s work used control as a way to get back at the individual who’d purportedly slighted him. Not thinking it through, the person who withheld the work was actually delaying the test results from getting back to the doctors, who needed accurate information in a timely manner to know how to best treat their patients. Imagine waiting to know if you had cancer, diabetes, or some other serious condition only to have the test results delayed because a couple of staff members didn’t like each other. Needless to say, after this was discovered, the staff person was fired and the rest of the team was put on notice.
Chronic Complainers
Everyone complains, but some take complaining to a whole other level, griping about anything and trying to get you to see their point of view, no matter how skewed it may be. They complain when they come into work in the morning, again at lunchtime, and they're still going at the end of the day. And then they start up again the next day. It makes you wonder that if they are so unhappy, maybe they should make some changes in their lives. But they probably won’t; complainers can make the work environment an uncomfortable place by perpetuating problems without coming up with solutions. You may need to develop coping strategies to tune out these individuals.
Gossips
People who gossip, like rumor mongers, are another group of people who like the control of having information they believe others don’t have but want. They are the “gatekeepers” of their precious information and will disseminate it at a time and in a way that gets them the most enjoyment. They can also control the degree of accuracy of the information or change it entirely. As we discussed with those who tend to undermine others, it is important to check the facts before passing the information along. Most people will not do their own investigating and just say, “So and so told me . . .” or “I heard . . .” to try to deflect ownership if the information turns out not to be true. It’s human nature to enjoy a juicy bit of gossip every now and again, but some people like to spread rumors as a kind of game. Unfortunately, false rumors can wind up disparaging the innocent. We can decide not to spread gossip and rumors just as we would like others to do for us. It comes down to self-control in whether we want to perpetuate a rumor or be mature enough to stop it.
Procrastinators
People who procrastinate or vacillate in their work can carry with them varying amounts of anxiety or may struggle with obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). These “perfectionists” can never seem to complete a project or get much work done because they are always thinking about or “tweaking” their work. Some procrastinators may actually be able to get a good start on tasks but get stuck in the end because they believe their work can always be better. This is frustrating for employers who have to be on the backs of these employees to get work done and extremely annoying for coworkers relying on everyone's contribution to get a project completed.
I once managed a staff member who had difficulty getting out of his own way at times and had a lot of trouble completing even the smallest of tasks due to his OCD. When this particular staff member decided to leave his position, I politely asked him to clean his office of the stacks upon stacks of papers he had accumulated so the next staff member could come into a clean office. I first asked about a month before he was scheduled to leave, then weeks before, and then during the final week. I went into his office the day before he was leaving, and when I asked why he hadn’t cleaned out his office, he claimed he hadn’t had the time. I spent the following week cleaning out the office, finding papers from 10 years prior that had absolutely no value. I don’t think the outgoing employee did this out of spite; he just think he couldn’t bear to throw a single scrap away.
The Benefit of the Doubt
When working with difficult people, the first place to begin an assessment is with yourself: Are you overreacting? Did someone inadvertently hit a “hot button” from some past trauma? Are you overly stressed? Are you overly sensitive? Or is the behavior of the other person so blatant you can clearly see where the problem is coming from? Some situations can be worked through with a non-blaming, non-challenging conversation. Perhaps the colleague is stressed due to a loved one with a serious medical issue or an adolescent with a drug addiction, or maybe their marriage is on the rocks. If you are close to the coworker, you may already know what is going on, but in many cases, you won’t. Be aware that any questions you ask could hit a sensitive spot, and the individual may be unwilling to discuss those issues. That is their prerogative. However, if coworkers are acting in a way that negatively impacts your ability to work, or if they are behaving in a threatening manner, this must be reported to management.
These are just a handful of situations that can make a work environment unnecessarily stressful, unhealthy, or toxic. Your workplace should not be physically or emotionally threatening to your well-being. In some cases, problems can be resolved by just talking to a coworker in a respectful manner. At other times, a supervisor or manager may need to be notified to help rectify a conflict. In extreme cases, the human resources department, in conjunction with your direct superior, may need to be called to try to bring a resolution for all parties. If a problem cannot be worked out, people may need to be let go or you may decide you need to leave to protect your mental health. No one should have to work in an environment that makes them sick or that causes them dread every day.
This post was adapted from the book, When to Call a Therapist: Expanded Edition, by Robert C. Ciampi, LCSW.
