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Key points
- The suicide rate has soared among youth and young adults over the last decade.
- Research shows that those who are more self-compassionate experience less anxiety and depression, and may be less likely to think about suicide.
- Self-compassion programs are designed to teach people how to be kinder and more compassionate to themselves.
This past month, two students at University of North Carolina, Chapel Hill took their own lives.
As tragic, devastating, and heart-wrenching as this is, the signs have all been here. According to the American College Health Association, suicide is the second-leading cause of death among college students, after accidents. One in five college students has had thoughts of suicide. This rate has tripled since the 1950s. Between 2007 and 2015, suicides doubled for females aged 15-19, reaching their highest point in 40 years. It also increased by 30% for males. Obviously, these are pre-pandemic statistics, and we know that stress has increased dramatically for teens and college students since then.
Of course, there is no simple explanation for these horrific statistics, but the shift is likely rooted in the confluence of many factors, including physical changes such as hormonal effects, changes in the teen brain making teens and young adults more prone to extreme emotional highs and lows, and external stress like social media, academics, and ongoing news about school shootings, climate change, and the pervasive contention in the political arena.
According to a 2018 Harris poll, 75% of those between the ages of 15 and 21 say mass shootings are a significant source of stress. Certainly, those problems are critical and need to be addressed, yet we cannot wait for that to happen. The mental health crisis among our youth is here and must be addressed now.
Benefits of self-compassion programs
Self-compassion programs offer one possible answer. Research on youth and self-compassion consistently shows that those who are more self-compassionate, who treat themselves with greater kindness and less hostility, endure less anxiety, depression, and stress. Our soon-to-be-published research on transgender teens, a population at high risk of suicide, has shown significant decreases in factors associated with suicide from before a self-compassion program to after the program is over.
Among other things, self-compassion teaches you that you don’t need to be so hard on yourself to be happy and successful—and that when you treat yourself like you treat your friends, with understanding, empathy, and patience, you can thrive.
And self-compassion works across the board. For adults and teens, the benefits have been confirmed in almost 4000 research studies. And self-compassion programs are now taught throughout the world. In particular, we now have a new self-compassion program for young adults aged 18-30 called "Embracing Your Life."
To be sure, many initially have doubts about whether being kind to themselves will actually help them achieve. Being self-compassionate goes against our culture and the way we were brought up. We were raised to be kind to others, but are taught that being kind to oneself will undoubtedly lead to passivity, laziness, self-indulgence, and self-pity. Interestingly, research studies have shown the opposite—being self-compassionate actually makes us more able to take on new challenges, be more resilient, more motivated to work hard, and overcome life’s challenges.
This mental health crisis won’t go away. Our youth are suffering, in pain, often paralyzed with crushing self-loathing. They are searching for a lifeline. It is our responsibility to help. Rather than turning away and hoping it gets better, let’s work together—parents, researchers, school administrators, teachers, and counselors—to bring research-based programs that work, like self-compassion, to the fore to help children develop the resilience skills they need to cope during these challenging times.
If you or someone you love is contemplating suicide, seek help immediately. For help 24/7 contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, 1-800-273-TALK, or the Crisis Text Line by texting TALK to 741741. To find a therapist near you, see the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.
