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Key points
- Going out to a restaurant early may decrease the wait time for food and the noise level.
- A smart tactic is to check out the menu before going.
- Even if your children don’t eat much at a restaurant, the experience of dining in a public space and experiencing new foods is important.
The event still embarrasses us when we recollect it, even though it occurred decades ago. We had taken our toddler to a so-called family restaurant, a pit stop on a long drive home. Our daughter sat in a high chair, singing to herself and dropping every morsel of food we put on the high chair tray on the carpeted floor. When the chocolate milk followed the rest of her food onto the floor, we decided to leave, quickly. After paying the bill, we slunk out of the restaurant wondering if we should have added extra money for cleaning the carpet.
That going out to dinner with young children may be difficult comes as no surprise to anyone who has had similar embarrassing moments in a restaurant. Yet it may be necessary when traveling, or on vacation, or something we want to do, especially when we are eating with close family or friends. And it is possible that the children might actually eat the food that they are served, rather than decorating the floor with it.
Fortunately, keeping the kids amused until their food arrives is relatively easy these days; an iPad or cell phone provides distraction with their games, books, and other screen-available activities. It is not unusual to see children at a restaurant table as absorbed in their cell phones as the adults accompanying them.
However, getting them to eat when the food arrives still remains a problem. The food on the plate is often of less interest than the game on the iPad. (A few days ago, we were sitting next to a family with a two-year-old and a five-year-old. The mother was trying to get them to eat, but their interest was digging in the dirt in the planter next to the table.) The second problem is the nutritional quality of the food offered on a children’s menu although, of course, if very little food is eaten, the fact that many foods served to kids are lacking in nutrient value is probably unimportant.
It may be possible to get young children to eat at a restaurant, but it takes some planning.
Eating Early
One strategy is to eat early. A restaurant is likely to be less crowded and the wait time for food shorter when you arrive by 5 or 6 p.m. If the food order arrives only several minutes after being seated, rather than close to an hour, the almost inevitable squirm factor may be avoided. By having food served quickly, the child may be able to sit still long enough to eat some of it. When mealtime is delayed, it may end up being so close to bedtime that tiredness overtakes appetite. Even adults lose their appetite when they are exhausted and ready to go to sleep.
Going out for dinner early may also prevent being in a restaurant when the noise level increases. When the volume of the music competes with the volume of the conversation in a crowded restaurant such that hearing anyone talk is hard, many of us feel agitated and find it hard to enjoy our meal. Children must feel even more unsettled, especially if they can barely hear their parents or be heard by them. (The noise level is useful, however, in drowning out the squabbles between siblings.) Most restaurants deliberately increase their music volume after 9 p.m., but some do this after 7 p.m. to boost the energy (and spending, supposedly) of their customers.
Previewing the Menu
Another smart tactic is to check out the menu before going. Restaurants may not have foods your child will eat, or they may be unwilling to serve child-size portions. Given the price of restaurant foods these days, it makes no sense to pay for a regular meal for a child who will eat an eighth of what is on the plate. Some cuisines are so spicy that they are unpleasant to young children. Years ago, our family was invited to an Indian restaurant by a friend. The food was delicious but very hot (as in spicy). Our son insisted on first rinsing all the food on his plate in his water glass so he could eat it.
Even if there is a children’s menu, you might want to consider options from the regular menu if they can be served in small portions. Often the food items on a children’s menu are relatively low in nutritional value. Typical items may include macaroni and cheese, hot dogs, and grilled cheese sandwiches. Chicken nuggets, pizza, French toast, and French fries are also popular items, but offer more fat than vitamins and, except for the chicken nuggets, contain very little protein. It is unclear why grilled cheese is found so often on the kid’s menu, as it tends to become unpleasantly sticky and chewy as it cools and, thus, is hard to eat. A better option might be to share some of your meal with your children. Portion sizes for adults tend to be so large that many adults will share an entrée. Or, you can order something from the regular menu for your kids to share—for instance, a couple of appetizers and a side dish like a baked potato.
Talk about the novelty of the new food. Sometimes taking the kids out to eat gives them the chance to taste and eat foods that are not eaten at home. Chinese dumplings, crepes, handmade ravioli, or tortillas are examples of foods that, for some of us, may be better made by a professional chef. Why give the kids hot dogs or mac and cheese when going to a restaurant gives them a chance to eat something you won’t (or cannot) make at home?
Delaying Drinks
One reason kids tend to play with or ignore their food when it is served is that they fill up on the drink ordered and served before the meal is delivered. A few days ago, I saw a mother and her five-year-old son eating at a table near us in an Italian restaurant. There was a can of Coca-Cola from which the boy was drinking. “Uh oh,” I thought. “He is not going to eat his meal because he is filling up with soda.” Sure enough, when a plate of pasta was put in front of him, he ate one or two noodles, picked up a toy truck, and pushed the plate away so he could play instead of eat.
The server should be told to delay serving a drink, be it chocolate milk, juice, or soda, until after the meal is served. If the child is thirsty, he or she can drink water. The same thing applies to rolls, breadsticks, or, as in a Mexican restaurant, tortilla chips.
Often the food is served in a quantity too large for a small stomach, as was the case with the pasta served to the little boy. Ask for an empty plate and offer the child a tiny portion at a time. This way eating the meal seems manageable and not overwhelming.
Even if your children don’t eat much when taken to a restaurant, the experience of dining in a public space and the chance to experience new foods and environments is important and rewarding—as long as the food doesn’t end up on the carpet.
