![Photo by peapodsquadmom via Flickr Paint Colors](https://cdn2.psychologytoday.com/sites/default/files/styles/article-inline-half/public/blogs/72583/2011/09/75607-66064.jpg?itok=7jdUVz-l)
Photo by peapodsquadmom via Flickr
My wife, Barb, has always loved names. She's the kind of person who wants to know the name of a paint color before she will consider how it will look on our walls--something like Mocha Java would likely meet her approval. When she was pregnant, she bought every possible baby-naming book. With the books we have written together, she could not proceed to write without the title being decided. So, it's no surprise that we could not start blogging until we had a name for the blog.
I was a big fan of the 80s British rock group, The Smiths. The group's lead singer and lyricist, Morrissey, was a notorious introvert off-stage. It was upon meeting guitarist and songwriter, Johnny Marr, that The Smiths were born. Morrissey developed a flamboyant stage presence that belied his introverted nature.
The Smiths were immensely popular in Europe. They were known for pairing pleasant and creative rock melodies with dark, brooding lyrics. Their music was reassuringly depressing, performed with energy and a wink.
In considering titles for our blog, Barb and I brainstormed many ideas. One evening, I recalled the Smiths' song, Ask, a surprisingly upbeat recording that accurately describes shyness. The lyric "Shyness is Nice" seemed the perfect umbrella for our writing:
Shyness is nice and
Shyness can stop you
From doing all the things in life
You'd like to
--Ask, by The Smiths
Barb and I met in graduate school. We had both been counseled by our professors about being "too quiet." In meeting each other, we found acceptance of our more gentle dispositions. On our first date, we listened to The Smiths.
Shyness IS nice. Most shy people are sensitive and caring. At the same time, though, that very shyness may prevent them from speaking up and sharing ideas the world needs to hear.
Barb published the first self-help book specifically for social anxiety, Dying of Embarrassment, in 1992. Twenty years later, it is still selling. We continue to write on the topic, hoping to help other shy and/or anxious people find their voices.
As for The Smiths, they released their last album in 1987, but they remain immensely influential. Their 1986 album, The Queen is Dead, is considered a classic. Rolling Stone ranked it #216 in its listing of the best albums of all time. Pitchfork rated it at the sixth-best album of the 80s. The Smiths have had a revival as of late-their music was featured in the movie 500 Days of Summer, starring Zooey Deschanel. Earlier this year, BBC Radio did a retrospective on the 25th anniversary of the release of The Queen is Dead. You can listen to Ask on Youtube by clicking here.
Now you know about The Smiths and how they inspired our blog title. I'm sure you can rest easy now.
Barb likes names and I like music. In the coming weeks, we will be exploring other aspects of the names and labels. What does it mean when we call ourselves "shy" or "quiet?" And what do some modern musicians have to say...