Why Caring and Character Matter

As the holidays approach, many are preparing to spend more time with friends, family, and loved ones. A feeling of generosity and kindness often permeates the holiday season, along with a sense of hope and expectation for the new year. Through this, we can come to care for one another more deeply; and this sense of caring, of generosity, of kindness, is arguably a much-needed balm for our society in the midst of conflicts and tensions, both at home and abroad.

Much has been, and continues to be, done to promote caring for one another. Harvard has a Center on Making Caring Common. Our collaborators at SHINE have published on the beneficial effects of a caring climate in the workplace. We’ve written previously on the importance of love in parenting and in society and of caring for others through volunteering. Acts of kindness are one of several evidence-based activities to promote flourishing. Reporting on the caring actions of others can help prompt further caring actions to propagate throughout society. We all need to continue this work of promoting a caring, kind, and generous society.

Caring and Character

To create a flourishing society, however, it is also important that this promotion of caring not be restricted to one-off actions when we are in a cheerful or festive mood. That sense of caring, of kindness, of generosity, of love of neighbor, really needs to be present throughout our lives if we, and if our society, are to flourish. We need to seek to be loving and caring not only when times are good, but also when life circumstances are difficult, or when we are not feeling particularly cheerful or inclined to assist others. Said another way, caring needs to become a part of our character.

Character itself might be thought of as someone’s habits of thought, emotion, and behavior that relate to a person’s ability to achieve goals or to attain what is good. When one’s goals and purposes are themselves good, and one’s actions, thought, and emotions reasonable, it arguably becomes proper to speak of virtuous character. Such good virtuous character, almost by definition, contributes to the flourishing of oneself and others. As examples, the virtue of justice is sometimes defined as “a steady and enduring will to render to each his or her due or right;” the virtue of generosity as the habit of “giving good things to others freely and abundantly”; the virtue of mercy or compassion as the habit of “heartfelt sympathy for another's distress, impelling us to help him or her if we can.” Each of these virtues concerns bringing about what is good for others. Good character contributes to the good of others. Good character enables the flourishing of others.

However, good character enables the flourishing of oneself, also. We have written previously on how one’s self-reported evaluation of a character statement, “I always act to promote good in all circumstances, even in difficult and challenging situations” predicts, a year later, a number of health and well-being outcomes, even after controlling for these same outcomes at baseline, along with a host of other factors.

In our most recent study on the topic, we extended this work to also examine more objective (not just self-reported) outcomes, obtained from medical claims insurance data. This work likewise found beneficial effects of various aspects of character on subsequent depression diagnoses, and possibly also with some evidence for effects on subsequent anxiety disorder diagnoses and on cardiovascular disease diagnoses, once again controlling for these same outcomes from claims data in prior years. The empirical evidence thus continues to mount that good character contributes not only to the well-being of others, but also to one’s own well-being.

Flourishing and Caring Character

Of course, these effects of character on well-being are just averages. Good character and caring actions will not always beneficially affect all aspects of one’s well-being. Caring actions can sometimes involve sacrifice. There may be some loss. However, this very point, perhaps itself, gestures towards how character may, in fact, constitute, and not just be causally related to, well-being.

To have good character and to care for others is part of what it means to flourish. We are social beings, and as such, our own well-being is intimately tied to that of those around us. The flourishing of others is, in some sense, a part of our flourishing. Helping others to flourish, being of caring character, is part of what it means for us to flourish as the type of social creatures that we are.

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It can sometimes seem as if our own well-being and that of others occasionally comes into conflict. However, a deeper insight is that by caring for others and by embedding such caring into our character, we are flourishing ourselves, even if there are accompanying losses and sacrifices. Plato and Aristotle, and many others who have thought about these matters, thus conceived of character as central to well-being. Having and exercising virtuous character is principally what flourishing looks like for a human person. It is constitutive of our own flourishing and contributes to the flourishing of others.

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Celebrating the Season

Such insights are relevant to us as individuals. They are relevant to our communities. They are relevant for our leaders. They are relevant in our professional lives. They are relevant in business. They are relevant in psychiatric care. They are relevant in the news media. They are relevant for shaping our society into one that is more just, more generous, and more compassionate. We need to work on caring for one another, not only when it comes easily, but especially when it is difficult. We need to embed caring in our character. We need to work towards loving our neighbors and even our enemies. This is by no means an easy task. It is one that requires continual work and refinement. It is one that requires that we encourage one another in this difficult work.

This time of year can be one of kindness and generosity to others, and towards those with whom we are close. But it can also be a time of reflection, in which we extend that sense of goodwill to all others, even towards those with whom we might disagree. Indeed, as the new year approaches, one possible resolution might be to work towards having that goodwill for at least one person towards whom we currently feel animosity, ill will, or even hatred; to seek forgiveness and a replacement of ill will with goodwill. This is hard work, but it is work that more firmly helps us embed caring into our character. It forms the habit of caring.

This holiday season, Christians all over the world remember and celebrate the birth of one who declared his mission to be “not… to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” and who taught others to follow in his footsteps. The Christian community has not always lived up to this lofty ideal. However, if the Christian message surrounding Jesus’ birth of “peace on earth and goodwill towards all people” is to be realized, we must all work towards devoting our lives towards better serving and loving others.

Different people will, of course, celebrate this holiday season in different ways. However, we can all also celebrate together by being generous towards and caring for others, certainly towards our loved ones, but also towards those from whom we feel estranged. These are the small and sometimes difficult steps towards embedding caring into our character, and thereby towards bringing about greater peace and justice, towards bringing about a more flourishing society.

Tyler J. VanderWeele, Director, Human Flourishing Program, Harvard University