How to Grow Glimmers and Feel Less Anxious

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I’ve noticed something recently. It’s a warm feeling that blooms in different parts of my body. It comes spontaneously and not on any predictable timetable. I have a weak bladder. But no, it’s not that. And it’s happening frequently.

They’re mini moments of calm, safety even. Like I’ve found something friendly and familiar or something friendly and familiar has found me.

I notice it when I think of a funny dog video from YouTube I love, or that clip when Joey from Friends has a turkey on his head (that had to be gross!). Or when I smell my favourite perfume or snuggle into my fuzzy PJ. These, I discovered have a name. They're called glimmers.

You Don’t Pull the Trigger, Your Past Does

Triggers, the opposite of glimmers, are much more well-known. A trigger is a stimulus that brings on an emotional reaction, it is linked to a past trauma or a distressing experience. It’s when something you see, hear, feel, touch, and smell reminds you of a traumatic experience. It’s commonly associated with complex PTSD or PTSD, but not always.

Each person’s triggers are different. One of mine is when someone (anyone) has this particular look on their face or they move their eyes in a certain way. The mouth and eyes widen and their brow furrows. It’s hard to pinpoint, really. A micro-expression, but powerful one. Unconsciously, it reminds me of a look on my mom or dad’s face that forecasted something bad was going to happen.

When this occurs, I freeze. Neck muscles clench. I might space out. I can’t find words. My vision narrows. It feels like my world is falling apart. I’m physically here in this world, but mentally and emotionally I’m back in my childhood home when I was 7. I’ve recognized these now as body memories from trauma. Not pleasant. Any of you who experience these, know what I mean.

Triggers are like the shadows that sneak up when we least expect them, stirring up emotions from our past experiences.

Shedding Light on Glimmers

But here's the thing: While triggers can feel like a gloomy cloud, glimmers are the shining stars that can pierce through the darkness.

The concepts of triggers and glimmers were developed in studies by behavioral neuroscientist Stephen Porges. But it was Deb Dana, a social worker, who first coined the term in her 2018 book, The Polyvagal Theory in Therapy. Glimmers positively impact our nervous system and mental health. Sara Moniuszko, in her USA Today article,¹ explains that “glimmers refer to small moments when our biology is in a place of connection or regulation, which cues our nervous system to feel safe or calm.”

A glimmer is a mini-moment that creates an itsy-bitsy mood shift. For example, when you pet your cat or hear your favorite song a gleam of contentedness emerges. Glimmers are those brief moments reminding us of the beauty and joy in the world, helping us feel safe.

How to Grow Glimmers

You can create more glimmers by creating a habit of intentionally noticing them. Grow glimmers by discovering what some of yours already are.

Notice what sparks a smidge of joy. Start by noticing the small, everyday things that bring you a little lift or sense of comfort. It might be a smile from a stranger, a good cup of coffee, or like me, jazz with rain sounds on a Spotify playlist.

Before I knew anything about glimmers, I looked out for those small things that spark calm, safety, and hope. I’m not talking about 15 minutes of joy. I’m talking about a second, even a millisecond of contentment. They will be there, I promise, if you intend to be aware of them.

When you actively seek out these positive experiences, you're planting the seeds for more happiness to bloom in your life. This isn’t about avoiding triggers altogether; it's about finding a balance and building resilience. Wrap yourself in your softest T-shirt, spend time with people who lift you, and notice even the most fleeting moment of comfort. Before you know it, you'll have glimmers of light even on the cloudiest of days.